Bilinçç

The word “trauma” is often used to refer to an overwhelming event or experience like sexual assault or a life threatening event. But repetitive experiences that cause intense stress and anxiety, can also have a substantial, long-term impact on our quality of life and well-being. Trauma creates stress reactions which become our most comfortable way of operating in the world and over a period of time they become Mol-adaptive and create a high level of arousal—or feeling alert or "on guard".

Our trauma responses take us to an Emergency mode in the body which gives us the capacity to access a lot of energy in a short period of time to maximise the chance of survival. We are required to only stay in the emergency mode for a short period of time or until the immediate threat has passed. The normal healing and recovery process involves the body coming down out of a state of heightened arousal. In other words, the internal alarms turn off, the high levels of energy subside, and the body re-sets itself to a normal state of balance and equilibrium.

This is where it is important for us to reframe our understanding of Trauma. Emotional trauma can result from any type of traumatic experience that causes overwhelming amounts of stress that exceed one's ability to cope and integrate the emotions involved, and can be a result of our early childhood experiences of the world, like neglect, verbal abuse, bullying, manipulation, or parental separation. Emotional trauma is more about the nervous system's inability to regulate stress and integrate emotions than it is about the actual event. Emotional traumas are often more complex than other types of stressors and can often persist far after the acute situation or relationship has ended.

It is possible to heal from emotional and psychological trauma. We know that the brain changes in response to a traumatic experience, our counsellors are trained in forward facing trauma therapy

Healthy boundaries can be the difference between a healthy, happy relationship and a toxic, dysfunctional relationship.The key to setting boundaries is first figuring out what you want from your various relationships, and communicating these boundaries based on those desires and being assertive to yourself and others when they feel like they are being ignored or crossed.
While setting boundaries are important it is also important to respect the boundaries that others have set for themselves. This goes for parents, children, romantic partners, bosses, coworkers, and anyone who interacts with or has power over anyone else. Respect is a two-way street, and appreciating the boundaries others have set for themselves is as important as setting boundaries for oneself.
“A boundary is a limit or space between you and the other person; a clear place where you begin and the other person ends . . . The purpose of setting a healthy boundary is, of course, to protect and take good care of you”
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The subconscious messaging behind perfectionism : If my performance and appearance match others’ expectations, I won’t be rejected, judged and shamed.  

Perfectionism is often seen as a positive trait, however it is a behaviour that can result in overwhelming pressure and anxiety and affect your self worth. Perfectionism leads to a host of behavioural challenges like, Procrastination, Re-work, Over-Thinking, Worrying too much about ones self image, All-Or-Nothing Thinking, Engaging with Fear,Guilt and Shame to name a few:

There are varying forms or perfectionism:

1. Self-oriented perfectionists set high personal standards that motivate them. These so-called “adaptive” perfectionists tend to succeed more and feel more positive. However the high standards they set for themselves often leave them exhausted, anxious and unfulfilled with their lives.
2. Other-oriented perfectionists hold friends, family and significant others to unrealistic standards. This can lead to blame, lack of trust and loneliness.
3. Socially prescribed perfectionists submit to high standards placed on them by their family, work, culture or society in order to avoid rejection. This can lead to anxiety, low self-esteem and self-harm.  

Some people identify with one type of perfectionism, while others might identify with all 3 to some degree. If you identify with these behavioural tendencies it will help to uncover the unconscious messaging that drives this behaviour, to lead a more well rounded and pressure free life.

If this resonates, make yourself a priority and reach out for help !

A Happy women’s day from all of us at team Bilinçç

Respecting your needs doesn’t make you a selfish person. It is perfectly okay to do whatever you need, to feel fulfilled, balanced, and connected to yourself. Start prioritising what you value in life and do whats best for you, feeling no guilt for being honest about how you feel, and never apologise for being YOU!

In the pursuit of Happiness ❤️

ROLE (I am this) vs IDENTITY (I am)

Identity is who we are, while a role is just what we do. Let’s pause for a moment to think about the problems we may have when we are not separating who we are from what we do. On any given day when we perform well in our role, we feel great about ourselves, and when we do worse in our role, we feel worse about yourself. All your good feels (JUJU) are performance based.

The greatest and most important adventure of our lives is that of separating ourselves from our roles and discovering who we really are. To many it may sound self indulgent, but it is actually an unselfish process that is at the root of everything we do in life. To be a valuable person to the world around us and play our roles as mothers, daughters, employees, healers, to the best of our abilities, we have to first know who we are and the purpose we bring to the world.

Reconnecting with our true identity is a deeply immersive process, which involves breaking down what was, shedding layers that do not serve us, while reflecting on who we really are and recognising who we want to be. Whatever that may be. It’s a matter of separating our value from any external outcome and recognising our personal power, while being open and vulnerable to our experiences.

It is a process which helps us chant and affirm “My value as a human is never under question”

Mental health is not the absence of mental disease.
It is our wish; on this day, that you love the person you are, and love the person you are becoming.

With love

Team Bilinçç

What happens to us when our emotions are not accepted in the way that we are feeling them?
Hearing someone say or DOWN, alerts us that we are not in control of our emotions and implies that we might be over-reacting to a situation. People often love directing us on how we should feel, especially when we are experiencing negative emotions.
We don’t like being told that things about us are NOT OK. it may make us question how the world sees us, it may make us question our own sense of normal and lead us to feel socially inept, different, anxious, or isolated. Our need to cope and adjust often forces us to suppress our feelings, avoid how we feel, deny or project it. In the short term this might help you feel like you have adequately adjusted to what society expects of you, but in the long-term avoiding how you feel, may leave you perpetually stuck in it, since you never worked through the experience.
Emotional acceptance is one of the things you might need to work through with a counsellor. Emotional acceptance is the ability to accept and experience the entire range of our emotions including the negative ones. We sometimes struggle to deal with negative emotions like anger, fear and sadness but they are a basic part of life. It may be tempting to control or deal with only what you are feeling in the moment, but it doesn’t get to the root of the emotions that caused the behaviour and works like a bandaid and may lead to more problems to deal with down the road. Putting a bandaid over our negative emotions can actually have the opposite effect, essentially these emotions exist like exposed live wires and when someone touches one of these live wires we are triggered and we lose control over when and how it shows up in our lives.
Accepting your emotions, helps you accept the reality of your situation, once you stop fighting so hard to suppress it, you can acknowledge your emotion and work towards pursuing behaviours that are aligned with your goals and values.
Team Bilinçç

is perhaps the most un-encouraging encouragement one can receive, especially when someone is coping with loss or grieving. There are many stages that one passes through during the process of grieving and perhaps some of those stages don’t include being strong.
If any harm comes to “strong people” are they expected to glide through effortlessly and escape unscathed ? Does a “strong person” not need support ? We know it’s not an insult to call someone “strong”, but sometimes it a heavy burden to carry. Being called strong puts a lot of pressure on the person to be consistently strong. What if they are not strong? What if they actually feel weak? And how do we decide that they have acted strong or weak?
Labelling someone strong could feel like you have reduced their personality, their experiences, their struggles down to be the one thing that defines them as a person. Being strong can be a powerful coping mechanism, however it does not insulate you from suffering. Strong people suffer too, they are often excellent performers projecting a perceived sense of wellness. Sometimes underneath this strong persona could be a whirlwind of vulnerable emotions that is craving to be expressed and accepted... a person waiting to hear "It's ok for you to feel this way"
Personally we dropped our “STRONG” labels a while back. It didn’t serve us to be just this one thing. We gave ourselves permission to breakdown, be weak, be vulnerable and it has been wonderful. Tell us what you think
Team Bilinçç

Connection is one of our most basic human needs. As basic as air, food, water and shelter, is our need for authentic connections to give us a sense of belonging.
There is a great need for human connection, especially in our modern society where everything happens at such a fast pace, attention spans are shorter than ever, and the technology that connects us electronically is also making us feel more alone. The lack of authentic and deep connections is seeing many of our everyday concerns escalating from worry and sadness to depression, anxiety and even self harm.
Affirming a person’s thoughts, feelings, and life experiences by empathetic listening creates a powerful bond with that person, it is an intimate experience, a privilege and an opportunity to connect deeply with another. Active listening is one of the most important learnable skills we can include in our daily lives and interactions.
“To listen is to pay attention, take an interest, care about, take to heart, validate, acknowledge, be moved, appreciate” - The lost art of Listening - Michael Nichols
Team Bilinçç

We are taking care of ourselves, because self care is self preservation. When we take care of ourselves, we are healthy enough to care of others.

You cannot give to others what you don't have for yourself. Self-care isn’t a guilty pleasure or an indulgence. It is about nourishing and nurturing yourself. Taking time out to listen to your mind and body. Self care isn't just one thing, you can do whatever works for you (singing,dancing,art,music,long-walks) Remember when you are healthy..... emotionally, mentally and physically, you will find it in you to show up completely for the people you love.

Team Bilinçç

Hello World,
We are mental health professionals who also practice other somatic and holistic therapies. It was our belief that our clients need to be supported and seen through a wider angled lens and our common interests and curiosity and that brought us together.
We are called Bilinçç it means “consciousness” in Turkish. We wanted our organisation to symbolise the work that we do while speaking to who we are as people and Bilinçç just connected with us intuitively. We also wanted our logo to be designed around some of the same principles and after some work with our designer we got one that connected with us instantly.
The “I” in our logo represents our clients. The fluid extension of this “I” in the form of a semi-circle, that ends with a bird in flight is symbolic of their inner journey to freedom, as we gently hold the space for them to explore, understand and reflect the different emotions depicted here by the blue waves that this journey may bring out.
We will be sharing parts of our experience and our learnings in this space, but we wanted you to know what we stand for first!
Team Bilinçç

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