Heal With Pavlina

Time and time again, I realize that the people I meet are another ME...
The people you interact with show you the consequences of their/your/our actions. Think about it. By truly listening and observing without judgment, you can choose how to prevent adverse conditions or induce more favorable ones. I get it now! I just get my act together and won't stop till I embody the most integrated version of myself. 😅Easy!

My time in Costa Rica taught me that we need to trust the good intentions of others and practice letting go of control, especially during a dance! Surrendering is not going to kill us; it gets us closer to God! Trust the grander plan.

These days, whether I'm dancing or not, I'm dropping into my body more and more. I'm convincing myself that it's safe to breathe and feel deeply. Our heads don't have the important answers to life anyway; they have only said facts and many lies, too. My heart breaks, repairs, expands, breaks again, and becomes even more open... It feels what it feels, and I will never judge myself for that again.

I'm so grateful for all the lessons of the past year and - for the Anarchist festival I'm volunteering at in Mexico right now. It's my third year here! This celebration of transparency, freedom, off-grid living, thinking out of the box, and alternative healing methods is a gift that keeps on giving.

If you don't agree with sovereignty, community, peace, and common sense, feel free to unfollow me 🥲

What an amazing workshop!

Comenzamos "Las Olas del Alma" en Costa Rica !!!

I feel so damn blessed.

This year I manifested some crazy s**t 😅

I went to Mexico again, reunited with my soul tribe, fell in love, fell out of love, did Tony’s virtual UPW, threw myself into work, burnt out, healed in the Swedish and Danish countryside, made new human and pet friends, met my Theta healing idol in the UK, considered moving to the Netherlands and studying there, happened to create demand as a Theta healer for female students in Prague, facilitated my first cacao ceremony and mini ecstatic dance, celebrated my birthday with my best friend in Germany, visited an old friend in Switzerland and found out my dairy intolerance wasn’t so bad, gave Holland another chance, reopened and closed a romantic chapter, learned firmer boundaries in love and at work, changed my approach to Ta**ra again, started writing more unapologetically about my experiences with men, understood my own avoidance by being patient and understanding toward another avoidant, broke the pattern, decided to fearlessly adopt a secure attachment, rewrote the script, reread the list, forgave myself and everyone for everything, solidified important friendships, and recently, flew to explore New Zealand free of charge with a real masculine gentleman friend, and I’m still counting all the blessings….

I've been on fire. Happy, healthy, free, and in love with life.
And you can be, too.
I've attracted the kind of people, situations, places, and abundance I needed because I finally acknowledged my value and worthiness and learned to receive without shame.

It’s been a magical journey.
Grateful for every moment ❤️
(More pics to follow, or check my stories and story highlights)

Anger can feel deeply shameful and ugly on the inside and outside as well. You're feeling resentful emotions that throw you out of focus, away from the path you were walking on just moments before. This recognition - I feel these feelings, yet I shouldn't because - insert -, is what creates internal conflict. Living in duality and should-ing all over yourself. It feels yucky. If you’ve been in the spiritual self-help self-awareness field long enough, you know that next up is 'the need to forgive.’

Let me tell you about that! Forgiveness can’t be forced, true forgiveness comes with time. You need time to heal, so allow yourself to feel angry first. Feel it alone or with your therapist in the safety of four walls. Feel the anger and give yourself permission to be unable to forgive if somebody hurt you, lied to you, or downright abused you. Feel your anger if life doesn’t seem fair, if you thought that you'd be much further down the timeline of your chosen milestones by now. Everyone has different standards. Don't wait for other people to tell you that you are alright and there's nothing wrong with you. Don't be so busy trying to forgive if you forget about your well-being in the process.

I’m not interested in being a good girl with only 'nice' emotions, it sucks. Who will give me a golden medal for suppressing the full array of human expression? When I heard the song Heaven Takes You Home by the Swedish House Mafia, I could sh*t myself. Did I need to hear there was nothing wrong with me? I allowed myself to feel all my fears, resentments, and hurt, and get really angry. Because it is normal!
I cried, and by the time the song was over, my mind had cleared. It is ugly if you abuse yourself with your bullying hate-talk. 
If you raise love, compassion, and FORGIVENESS towards yourself, you’ll become beautiful, and all the garbage you harbored towards another won’t affect you anymore. Sincere forgiveness must start with yourself. Listen to Ho'oponopono mantras, and you’ll see - it's never been about others, it's been about you. With this mindset, you’ll choose to write a new story next time.

Do you trust the masculine?

God-energy displays masculine-like qualities of Protectiveness, abundance of resources, guidance, and strong will. I trust that. But mankind…?

Trust is earned, they say…. Yes, other humans should prove themselves before we resort to blindly trusting everything they say or do ❣️

If the masculine is supposed to protect and provide, then the feminine is here to surrender and receive. I want that! Yet men hurt us with their manipulative lies, lack of care, and cowardice. Women can’t reach their highest potential if they’re being constantly betrayed and abandoned.
As such, the above saying implies MISTRUST by default.

I tried being intentionally mistrustful for a day, and aw, how yucky that felt! I wanted to curse the Universe - Why have you made me this way? I don’t trust anyone. I despise the masculine, all men, and I hate lies.
I don’t know who suffered from my rigid skepticism more - the other or I?!

I asked myself- Do I enjoy expecting lies, manipulation, and abandonment?
I felt this pit in my stomach as I wandered the Dutch streets mistrustful, unprotected, and unfulfilled.
Then I remembered that our thoughts make us sick, nothing more.
->Change your thoughts, raise your vibe, act differently, and change your life. Wow 🤯

So I had to ‘change my mind’.
What are the positives I could focus on? There were many.
Gradually, I changed my mind about the world, the masculine, all males, and everything in between.

The man came home, and I hugged him tight. My vibe has shifted.
Do I trust?
I still don’t, in all humans.
But I have trust that Spirit’s got my back and the Universe has a good reason for every detour. I may never find the reason why life happens the way it does.
We only live once, and all we want is to love, be loved, and make love.
I realized that acting on thoughts like these makes me feel so much better, so I’m sticking with them!

♥️ If you need help embracing your feminine qualities of trust, surrender, and softness, I’m here for you! 💌


Photo

Meeting some tight personal deadlines. Will be back before the end of the month.

Heartbreak can be so earth-shattering the ache feels never-ending. Know it will end someday.
You can significantly lessen your suffering by following these 15 tips above (swipe trough the slides).

Are you afraid to be vulnerable and state the conditions for your involvement with the new love-interest upfront? Does he know that you want a committed relationship?

I haven't communicated my needs eight years ago. Then I was surprised they weren't met 🤷🏻‍♀️. My breakup was dragging because I couldn’t let go. I wanted to master my lessons and probably change him, too. But it doesn't work that way. I wish I could have said to the younger me: Go, change yourself, and don't look back!

Eight years later, my ex and I occasionally exchange conspiracy memes, or I respond with laughing emojis. Don't feel you have to keep in touch with anyone, though. Sometimes, you must cut your ex out of your life ASAP, especially until you heal and forgive everyone everything. Let past lies not bother you, just don’t give the person another chance to break your trust.

Life can be amazing!
💔-> ❤️‍🩹-> 💝

Betrayal can be so earth-shattering the heartache feels never-ending. Know it will end someday.
You can significantly lessen your suffering by following these 15 tips above (swipe trough the slides).

Are you afraid to be vulnerable and state the conditions for your involvement with the new love-interest upfront? Does he know that you want a committed relationship?

I haven't communicated my needs eight years ago. Then I was surprised they weren't met 🤷🏻‍♀️. My breakup was dragging because I couldn’t let go. I wanted to master my lessons and probably change him, too. But it doesn't work that way. I wish I could have said to the younger me: Go, change yourself, and don't look back!

Eight years later, my ex and I occasionally exchange conspiracy memes, or I respond with laughing emojis. Don't feel you have to keep in touch with anyone, though. Sometimes, you must cut your ex out of your life ASAP, especially until you heal and forgive everyone everything. Let past lies not bother you, just don’t give the person another chance to break your trust.

Life can be amazing!
💔-> ❤️‍🩹-> 💝

I started collecting diplomas in alternative therapies at the age of 21.
Today, young women of that age search the internet precisely for what I have to offer 15 years later. Reiki, meditation, EFT, nutrition, Ta**ra, Theta Healing, and Rapid Resolution Therapy.*
They can see that traditional psychotherapy alone doesn't work.

Medication for depression and anxiety numb us even further but in a 'legal' way.
I experienced that prescription drugs don't resolve the root issue of poor mental health.
If you're still self-medicating behind your therapist's back, whether with alcohol, drugs, junk food, or self-harming, your meds will never mitigate the damage.

Theta Healing, EFT, certain superfoods, bodywork, and other therapies like RRT can quickly release pent-up emotions so you gain clarity about your unhappiness and stop abusing yourself. When you achieve peace at heart and mental clarity, you start acting toward your well-being and chosen path. There are no right or wrong directions; you forge your best way. I can help you discover your passion and speed up the process of finally living the life you want. There's no time to waste on wallowing in misery or self-pity.

My Healing and Coaching sessions are not always about preventing you from making mistakes because some lessons in this life cannot be avoided; they must be experienced.
So own your detours and permit yourself to bloom at your own pace.

Today, I'm not studying only to improve myself; I want to help others feel better, too. I’ve accepted and reparented my inner child a long time ago. My discernment is crucial, so I don't start advising my younger self and instead employ a client-centered approach. I always ask the Creator: What does my client need? What is the best outcome for them? No story is the same. I deeply respect the individual's past, current circumstances, culture, and dreams.

Do not give up on yourself! A daily effort is needed if you want to learn to love yourself. I can help you feel better. For more visit:
linktr.ee/pavlinaf

Photos with my Australian, UK, and US friends who started inspiring me to help youths navigate life already in 2016 🙏🏼 ♥️

When feelings of doom and gloom come, it's hard to take care of yourself as if you were your best friend and keep showing up in life, eat well, go to the gym, or meditate. I can't do these things when I feel unhappy!
The PARADOX is that the less we do that, the unhappier we are. So logically, we should make a salad, go out in public, exercise, and then sit down and meditate!? No, it doesn't work that way.

I found a solution a long time ago. It's dancing. The more I do it, the happier I am.
It’s the only habit that I have kept even when I was depressed. It just changed rhythm from jumping high to STARTING SLOWLY BY CRAWLING ON THE FLOOR.

Now dance is my daily evening RITUAL in the living room (or kitchen, bedroom, nature).
I trust the dance between my Inner Child and Higher Self.
It doesn't feel like exercise, more like MOVEMENT-MEDITATION, but if you forget about yourself for 1 or 2 hours and move to high-energy music, you'll sweat! Neither does it feel rigid or like a performance that someone else will have to evaluate (Is she doing it right?).

You’re freeing yourself from all shackles of judgment, structure, and historical dramas - it's free-flowing, playful, private, and very much 'PRESENT.' Aka: I'm here now.

Dancing will clear your head. Suddenly, things will seem so straightforward. Your Inner Child has desires because they exist - and are out there for you to claim if you want them! The final shape they come in will look different than what you expect. LET GO OF THE EXACT FORM.

When you let your intuition, Higher Self, and GOD step in, you'll get the most useful revelations. These moments of pure presence, freedom, and limitless thinking will flood you with joy and self-love. You'll know what to do next.
THAT’S WHAT DANCE DOES. It's an embodiment of pure consciousness. When you get access to your answer, you don't need to understand it. You don't need a reason for your decision; you just need to feel it's THE RIGHT THING TO DO.

I encourage you to play with freestyle dancing in your home, outdoors, or during ecstatic dance circles. 💜

This is a reminder to stay centered, be present right here, right now, “chop wood, and carry water…”

Are you lagging behind, or are you a unique [late] bloomer?

I stopped my overthinking by dancing.
Feelings of not being good enough, not having enough, and shaming myself for manifesting at snail speed resurfaced, as they do every couple of years (or months!) I moved free-style to recenter and return to my heart.

What to do if you’re comparing yourself, have fear of missing out (FOMO) or joining in (FOJI) at the same time?

The answer for me is always: more self-love ❤️ finding the positives in my uniqueness.
Your story, your philosophy, your heart, your dark, and your light - will never be replicable!
The doubtful, grieving, lost, and small self is part of you because your thoughts seem real, but they’re still not God’s truth.
You are more than that.
Fall in love with who you are now.

As a true Splenic Projector, I have mixed feelings about social media. One day I want to share everything and save the whole world; the next day, I want to switch off my phone and hermit for weeks. Call it inconsistency; I call it being selective about how, when, and where I feel comfortable giving my energy.
We need to explore our own unique boundaries.

Only when I turn down the outside noise, be it posts from successful entrepreneurs, podcasts from influencers, or instructional Zoom recordings on how to build a funnel, do I feel into my own needs and desires.
I was not built for the modern hustle-marketing culture. It doesn’t mean I want to live under a rock as a cavewoman, I still appreciate the internet and all its advantages, but I’m not a Generator by default.
And I’m choosing that to be okay.
If I don’t accept it, I lose that magnetic all-seeing essence that only 20% of all Human Design types as Projectors and Reflectors have.
Celebrate YOU. Now. Here.

Cheers to being a 36-year-old woman who could not give a fck about meeting your societal and cultural norms!
As always, more musings are on the blog.

These 5 things can help cease addictions, feelings of emptiness, loneliness, and get clear on who you are and what you’re looking for in life, love, and career.

1. PRAYER-MEDITATION
I connect to spiritual God and my heart before connecting to the rest of the world. This also means no phone for the first hour or so.
Believing in my version of an all-loving, protecting Universe is primary.
I recommend starting every day in silence and finding faith and gratitude in the present moment. If you live with a partner, simply make the request that you both don’t talk until this meditative part is done.

2. THE RIGHT NUTRITION AND EXERCISE
The body and mind are connected, fueling the spirit together. Learn about Nutrition and recognize that what you put in your mouth matters. It goes without saying that drugs, alcohol and ni****ne won’t meet your deepest needs. They feed the addictive cycle, not your soul.
If we ensure we get the optimal amounts of vitamins and minerals from whole foods and herbal supplements, we can keep mood swings under control. But, we’re only human and own a full spectrum of emotions! Sadness, anger, frustration, joy, despair are normal.
In any case, express them with DANCE. My favorite kind of free-style movement that never gets old. Shake off years of stuck emotions in a nice sweaty session. Clearer head and endorphins guaranteed.

3. CONNECTIONS
When I forget kindness to self, thankfully, I have amazing friends scattered around the world. Regular communication with your chosen community is key. Stay in touch with good souls. It is a type of nourishment that no food, wine, or work can supply. And hug 🤗

4. JOURNALING
I’ve kept diaries and journals since 9 years old. That’s a lot of written pages! I had to burn a few copies some years back as re-reading them brought back painful memories. However, writing my feelings down at that time was life-saving. I turned the journal burning into a ritual of letting go. Why try it? You’ll organize your thoughts and understand your processes better. Once it's on paper, you'll feel lighter! Feel free to burn after writing.

5. TRAVELING
It will brings fresh blood into your veins.
(Continues in comments)

Are you your own worst enemy?

If any form of abuse happened to you in the past, shutdown and self-abuse follow in the future. The perpetuation of familiar drama - how well we know this cycle!

You’ve experienced so much emotional and physical pain that you’d do anything to avoid it in the present. You escape it with the ‘help’ of food, alcohol, ci******es, drugs, or hard s€x.
But you know it’s not deeply pleasing, nor sustainable.

If you don’t express the fullness of who you are for the fear that it could be ‘too much’ for some people, you dim your love, your light, and your pleasure. You push others away to take back control and not be the one who gets abandoned first.
I’ve done that.

Sabotaging your love, career, and health at the expense of staying alone and stuck in ‘familiar’ works for so long.
You self-sabotage if you’ve set your standards and ‘pleasure thermostat’ too low.
You get a glimpse of joy and it scares you. You can’t handle the unknown, something beyond your comfort zone, so you focus on your fears instead of on your love. You are a Master Manifestor. Breakups, burnouts, illnesses and injuries - you’re the common denominator in all the unfavorable circumstances.

Take responsibility for your healing.

Are you punishing your body for having felt pain or inappropriate pleasure?

If you feel numbness or discomfort in your body, it’s an indication that emotional trauma lodged itself within the tissues.
The body never lies, the mind is the liar.

If you choose to begin a psychosomatic healing journey with me, you’ll heal the past, uncover where you still abuse yourself, and be able to unblock on all levels.

Dislodging pain from the mind and body in a safe space will end the cycle of self-abuse and start raising your thermostat for a pleasurable life.

I feel more alive when I allow my weirdness, playfulness, and sensitive body to coexist. I know that opened body is capable of feeling both pleasure and pain. We can’t be selective here.
Embrace it all.

Healing is a process.
If I can do it, you can do it. Contact me, I’m here to guide you!

**ra

I’m back in the Ta***ic world but in a new way.
I help women transmute their womb’s trauma into spaciousness that’s pleasurable and open to receive.

A woman doesn’t need to experience direct violence to carry traumatic energetic imprints inside. They can come from her mother’s lineage, fellow sisters, or self-betrayal.

Even if you consented to all your past intercourses, or if your silence was interpreted as consent, sometimes your spirit was not firmly seated in your body. Self-preservation/survival mode, guilt, shame, and the fear of being punished, misunderstood, or hurt could play a part. But your body keeps a score of all your voluntary and involuntary abuse. 💘

You can heal it!

Allow the flow of your sensuality, and if you choose NOT to have s&x, let that be okay!
Once you’re present in your body, free from past traumatic energetic imprints, you’ll magnetize somebody worthy of entering your field.
Until then, learn to relax your pelvic floor. Keep asking your womb what it wants. Heal immersed in water, with yoni eggs, massages, and nourishing food.

❣️Take as much time as you need. I dare you to ask: Does my mind and body feel safe??? Is my heart involved?
If yes, give yourself permission to receive his masculine gifts like never before.

It seems we have entered a new era where random s&x is the cool thing to do, and if you don’t do it, there’s something wrong with you. You must be too frigid, masculine, closed off, or afraid to open up to pleasure!
Yeah! What if you’re all of that? Then what?
Are you less worthy than the so-called se&ually liberated people, Alpha players, and sirens who have their sexy s*t together?

Let me remind you that a few male Ta***ic gurus r@ped in the name of Ta**ra and ended up in court. A famous female Tantrika, Psalm Isadora, committed su***de.
S$xual energy is such a powerful force, and it can be - and is - abused. 💔

If you’re ready to gain clarity about your s&xual desires, I’d be delighted to help. We’ll uncover your blocks and release them in the comfort of your own home.

DM for support!💓

**ra

Do you think that with my se&ually liberated side (🤣), I don’t get jealous?

Wrong!

Especially at the beginning of any romance, I want to hug my lover to death. I want to spend so much time with him, fck every half hour everywhere, and want him to have all eyes on me, just as well as I do for him. The lioness in me gets territorial!
If I sense any emotional attachments to his ex or whoever, I feel some jealousy.
But….
I’m also nonchalant about it. Over time, it disappears, and then I want to bring him st*****rs 🙌🏼.

It's because I know that plutonic lust, meaningless (yet passionate) int€rcourse, and actual feelings of deep love are all very different concepts.
There’s a time and place for all three.

It’s okay to feel some jealousy sometimes.
We all fear abandonment and rejection, after all!❗️
Honest communication about one’s s£x drive, boundaries, and physical needs UPFRONT is key to a solid relationship.

❗️But what if you were cheated on?
Cheating - aka your partner lying about their se&ual whereabouts behind your back, holding you hostage to their lies.
I’ve been there. It’s not the s£x with someone else per se, it’s their lies and your comparing of yourself that hurt the most.

The key to not getting destroyed by the effects of betrayal is to know that:
♥️ You gotta stop the comparison. �♥️ You need to communicate your needs clearly.�♥️ Instal stronger boundaries in the same relationship, take a break or get couple’s therapy.�♥️ In the case of separation, entertain the idea that their happiness is your happiness.�
Don’t give up on true love, and don’t mistake se&ual adventures with different people for love.
Your partner may deeply love you and still decide to sleep with someone else.
There are a million reasons why they would or wouldn’t.

Based on a recent coaching session with a client who had been cheated on, I know that
If you’ve recently been betrayed, I can help you deal with your jealousy and grief and help you move on, with or without the same partner, in less than 3 sessions.
DM!

**ra

Please read my previous post. If you’re close to me, you have my number. 📞

If you wanna work with me,
Business is open as usual. 👩🏻‍💻
For ways to contact me, links in Bio.
Pls, do not comment or DM. I will not read it until a few weeks or months from now.

I’ve eliminated so much noise from my life in the past month, but there’s still some.
I’m taking a break from Instagram.
I need to free up some space 🙌🏼

I already disabled all notifications since last year and limited my time of scrolling and story-watching to 1-2x a day, with Sundays off recently, but it’s still not enough.
I’m an alien not from this planet, clearly!
Plus Projector in Human Design. Aka - I can’t do this hustling s*t!
I want a simple life, not seeing all these distractions.

On top of that, none of my clients ever came from social media.
They met me in person, got a referral/ word of mouth, or saw an announcement I posted elsewhere and then sent me a text or e-mail.

Hopefully, you already got my e-mail or Telegram.
If you are new, here are my website links where you can contact me.
https://linktr.ee/pavlinaf
https://healingthedivinemasculine.webnode.page

Lose plans:
✨ Keep working on myself to feel more grounded in my body and mind.
✨ Get from UK size 12 back to 8-10.
Not for you, lovers, friends, father, or mother; it’s for me.
Self-discipline is sexy. (But being out of control for a while was rather fun!)
✨ Energy healing course in London
✨ Seeing my soulmate girlfriend in Norway (we hang out in Oz, Bali, and Mexico, but the European grounds are yet to be christened 😁
✨ Sweden again.
✨ I’d love to attend the ‘Alchemy of sound’ retreat with Dominique Zuniga in Thailand, but I’m not gonna overwork myself making that happen.
✨ October - Costa Rica, see if that could be a part-time home.
✨ November - Mariposa Freedom Fest in Mexico.
✨ The rest is TBD.

I’ll report when I’m ready to face socials again.
For now, I’m uninstalling this thing.

Have a great time! 👋🏼

Love,

Pavlina

Do not compare yourself, or you will lose yourself.

All these people who wake up at 5 am, go to bed at 9 pm.
The people who fast till lunch have dinner or a naughty snack before bed.
Cannot fasting for 12-16 hours be performed at anytime according to your most convenient lifestyle?
The skinny ones always feel hungry and still believe they look fat when they look in the mirror.
Those who seem to be on a constant holiday work hard in the background and, I’m a witness, feel quite ungrounded.
People in relationships still fight behind closed doors, and sure, they have a hot make up s3x, but they might also dream about other people.
And lastly, aren’t you tired of all the masculine and feminine shoulds, musts, and don’ts?
I sure am.
I always thought I was a very feminine woman until I started following other coaches ( ).
Suddenly, I began to wonder, hang on, something might be fundamentally wrong with me. Am I a feminine woman who gives off masculine vibes???
Am I not supposed to be bold, outspoken, ‘too much’, mentally or physically strong, or an inspirational go-getter who gives good advice? Hell, am I not supposed to be a female leader????

Well, I’m not perfect. And God knows that the webinar that took me weeks (in fact, years) to produce and on a take 184th, I capitulated, and said Enough, let’s release it into the world anyway, might seem tragic in the eye of a Ted Talk speaker, but I am damn proud of myself.
No need to tell you how all the phobias regarding my accent, appearance, and public speaking make me suffer.

But I offer something unique and refreshing to the feminine/masculine, e£otic, relational world. You’ll see.

If you compare yourself, you’ll lose yourself and your uniqueness.

All links in Bio.