The Milk & Honey Doula

Birthing affirmations 🌸
Mamas, feeling crafty? During pregnancy you can spend some time turning these affirmations into artwork to put around your home for gentle reminders that your birth will be easy and positive! During labor your birth partner can snag this cheat sheet so he or she can give you some reassurance and support to cope with your contractions. Birthing affirmations are one simple way to send positive messages to your mind that birth is normal and you were made to do this! Your doula loves you! ♥️

Going in for a scheduled birth tonight. Send the good baby vibes our way 👼🏼

Can we make some noise for collagen please? 🎉
Taking collagen during pregnancy is something easy and simple you can do to help you have the birth you want! By preventing premature rupture of membranes you’ll be less likely to get on the slippery slope of interventions. With your waters intact you’ll feel less pain from contractions and you’ll have the freedom to labor without being on a timeline. In labor, as soon as a woman’s water breaks this is the point of no return, the baby will be born, and if you’re in a hospital setting the clock starts ticking. By keeping your water intact you can feel less stress and allow your body to labor naturally, however slowly or quickly it needs to happen. Trust your body! Give it some help with ✨collagen✨ to strengthen baby’s home AKA your amniotic sac!

I have been working super hard on my childbirth education course and I want to hear from you!
What do you wish you knew going into birth? If you’re currently pregnant with your first, what are you most curious about regarding labor and birth?
Birth Without Fear is CONSUMER centered- this is special just for you guys! It can be whatever it needs to be. Tell me, what’s most important to you and your birth partner?

Your doula loves you ♥️

Milk & Honey Doula Services is fully booked for the year! My books are now open for 2023. I’m so grateful for my wonderful clients who have invited me into their sacred birthing time. Thank you! I look forward to continuing doing what I love & supporting moms to bring their babies earth side in 2023 🎉

All babies are born with preferences, opinions, and unique personalities! But, if you are wanting to introduce a bottle and aren’t sure where to start I would recommend looking for one with a shape similar to the bottle! Their bottles mimic the shape of the breast AND the way the baby has to extract the milk!

Breastfed babies don’t suck on a ni**le like a straw- it’s more of a kneading motion, so having a bottle with an elongated ni**le like this one might just making switching from breast to bottle that much easier 💓

One last tip! Introducing a bottle to a breastfed baby should be done after breastfeeding is well established (3-4 weeks) but before too much time passes and the baby feels strongly about their preference for only taking a breast. My recommendation would be at one month start with having someone other than the breastfeeding parent give baby a bottle 1 time a day.

In my experience this helps baby stay flexible 😎

About 8 years ago I attended my very first childbirth education course where we were told that epidurals were safe and that “we would love it”. The possible risks were not covered, and I felt I was being encouraged to receive one in labor. About a month ago I sat in on the same class and heard the same words spoken. Why aren’t we giving moms the facts?

Epidurals can be a great choice for pain relief if a mom has had an especially long, hard labor and truly needs that break to gain her strength back to begin pushing. What I don’t love to see is women coming into L&D barely dilated then being offered an epidural on the spot. Epidurals can slow labor down and come with real risks to the infant and the mother.

Epidurals are not BAD, but they do come with risk that every mother should be made aware of BEFORE she’s contracting and mentally in a different, vulnerable place.

Choosing to use an epidural does not make you any less of a woman than a mother who chose an unmedicated labor. Every birth is different and sometimes an epidural is the best choice for a mom and her baby.

I’m all about informed consent and you deserve to have the facts before you make a choice regarding pain relief!

I would encourage all my clients to research, ask questions, and make a plan before labor begins. That way you’ll feel in control of your experience which will ultimately lead to a more satisfying and positive birth.

🎉Coming soon to Braselton, GA
Milk & Honey Doula Services presents Birth Without Fear with Taylor-Joy Marbury!
My love for birthing families and the need for unbiased childbirth education in our community has led me to create a consumer based curriculum for moms and dads who want to feel prepared, at peace, and supported in their journey to parenthood. Stay tuned for more info! 🤎
Beautiful artwork by Boho for Mini.

Here’s a bite size list of things you can do to help prepare your mind and body for an unmedicated birth! To learn more please visit my blog (link in bio).

🤎 Get that baby into position!
Do you know why so many babies are breech, transverse, posterior, etc.? A lot of it has to do with a woman’s posture towards the end of pregnancy. When we lean back into squishy couches and chairs the baby has to work against gravity to be in the head down position facing your back, called occiput anterior. A poorly positioned baby can make labor harder, longer, and more painful. Try sitting on a birth ball, on the floor with your knees open and feet together, or leaning over the back of a chair instead.

🤎 Walk, Walk, Walk
Improves blood flow, lowers your risk of gestational diabetes (no IV in labor means freedom of movement!), reduces your chance of a complicated delivery including a cesarean, encourages baby to engage in the pelvis, and improves your stamina for labor.

🤎 Practice some deep breathing
In early and active labor long deep belly breathing can help your body relax. When we breathe deeply this way it sends the message to our mind that we are safe, all is well, and we can be calm. When the mind is calm the body follows which means faster labor and a happy mama.

🤎 Talk to your baby and tell them what you want them to do!
Babies listen to their surroundings in the womb and their favorite sound, is the sound of their mama’s voice. Examples to get the conversation started: “Hi baby, it’s mom. We are so close to meeting each other.” “Put your head down baby and face my back.” “We are in this together. We will work together during contractions.”
Fun fact, when I was pregnant with my 4th baby who loved hanging out in the posterior presentation I would crawl on my hands and knees for 30 minutes a day singing to him and talking about labor. I would tell him where to go and that he would be more comfortable if he turned around. That boy moved into the right spot in the nick of time! 👏🏼

🤎 Stay hydrated!
Ample amniotic fluid, reduces swelling, keeps our muscles/organs/brain functioning properly. A dehydrated mom feels more pain during labor than a hydrated mom.

May is maternal mental health awareness month. I’ve seen so many women go through traumatic births and then struggle postpartum. I’ve seen woman who seemingly had a perfect birth then fell apart a few weeks later. I’ve seen woman carry around unnecessary shame because of how they’re feeling.

You don’t have to struggle 🧡 Reach out to a doula, therapist, or other mothers to talk about how you’re feeling and get some real help. There are resources available to you and if you don’t know where to start or what to say, that’s okay. I can help you.

Motherhood is beautiful and terrifying and all consuming and wonderful. One of the most helpful things I heard when I was struggling with PPD after my third baby was, “God chose you to be his mom”. Religious or not I think this can apply to anyone who feels like they’re underwater and don’t know why or how to fix it. Your baby is lucky to have you and asking for help does not equal failure. You were made for this and it will be okay 🌈

Breast size does not affect the success of your breastfeeding journey! Breastfeeding works on supply and demand. So, however much milk your baby consumes is how much milk your body will produce.

Breast size is determined by fluid, fatty tissue, and a small portion of that is milk.

All women have unique breast size, shape, and different ni**les too! All breast and ni**le types are acceptable for breastfeeding.

If baby is steadily gaining weight and having adequate wet diapers, then you’ll know he or she is getting enough milk. The size of your breasts truly don’t matter at all.

I’ll say it once, I’ll say it a thousand times: Your body is NOT a lemon. You are perfectly designed to grow and sustain life. 🤎💛

Happy Mother’s Day to all the beautiful mamas. Your doula loves you ♥️

You know how in the movies when a woman is giving birth she is usually strapped to several machines, pushing on her back, writhing in pain and screaming for help? Does birth really happen this way? Sometimes! But usually it’s nothing like that…in general birth is a beautiful event that works best when we leave it alone! I want my clients to remember their strength and know that birth can be easy and even painless! I know this to be true because I’ve done it myself 😊 The movies portray birth like this for the drama- it makes the film/show ✨exciting✨. What if movies showed how birth usually happens? What if we showed how normal it is and how strong women really are.

I’m a doula not a director, but if we swapped the screaming woman for a woman in a birthing tub, with twinkling Christmas lights, soft music, her partner rubbing her shoulders, and her doula softly speaking birth affirmations to her…that would be pretty great and send the message to all birthing people of how labor REALLY IS. Calm and enjoyable birthing is the norm not the exception, but people don’t know that because fear sells more!

Having an experienced doula to help you navigate the phases of labor can be extremely helpful if you’ve never done it before or if your previous births were hard and traumatizing.

Don’t let well meaning friends and family weigh you down with their negative birth stories, outdated advice, or by projecting their own fears onto you. Birth is normal, you’re not dying, it will be okay 💓
I’ve got your back.

Black women are THREE TIMES more likely to die from a pregnancy-related cause than white women. Let that sink in. According to the CDC, “Multiple factors contribute to these disparities, such as variation in quality healthcare, underlying chronic conditions, structural racism, and implicit bias.

Georgia has one of the highest maternal morbidity rates in the country. It’s actually dangerous to give birth here compared to other states.

Doulas are helping to reduce this number, and as your doula I will amplify your voice and make certain it’s heard so you get the quality healthcare you deserve! Black mamas matter 🤎 I see you, I hear you, I will fight for you.

Induction bypasses the baby’s ability to start labor when she is ready. Labor begins when baby’s lungs have reached maturity and she produces hormones that work in harmony with mom’s hormones that prepare the cervix to ripen & for your uterus to push baby out.

Induction leads to a medicalized birth: interventions such as IV fluids and continuous electronic fetal monitoring reduce your mobility in labor & remove options for natural pain relief like laboring in the tub or walking the halls.

Typically with inductions synthetic oxytocin is used to start contractions, but pitocin does not affect cervical changes! This means harder, longer, stronger contractions come on MUCH more quickly not allowing you to find your rhythm and coping mechanisms. This can lead to feeling like each contraction drowns you because you never got the chance to adapt as they slowly progress, like in spontaneous natural labor. It’s also likely that baby won’t tolerate labor as well because of the sudden intensity of contractions.

Inductions can fail. If your body and your baby are not ready, labor & natural birth won’t happen. When an induction fails a cesarean is typically done.

Research shows first time moms who choose induction are two to four times more likely to have a cesarean!

Inductions carry risk, especially if they are done too early. Inductions significantly contribute to the prematurity rate in the US.

Not all caregivers categorize medical reasons for induction into the same level of risk. Finding a provider who respects your wishes for spontaneous labor and who will work with you to avoid induction is key. Occasionally, inducing is what’s best for the health of the mom and the baby. Every option should be exhausted before the provider makes that decision- because you deserve that.

Let me paint you a picture…you go in for a routine checkup with your doctor at full term. She measures your fundal height (how tall your uterus is reaching) and tells you you’re measuring 1, 2, maybe 3 weeks ahead! She’s worried your baby is getting “too big”. So she takes you into ultrasound where the tech tells you baby is measuring 8lbs already and you still have 3 weeks to go. Cue the eyebrow raises, audible gasps, and whipping out the calendar to schedule you for an induction. “Let’s take baby out before they get too big.”

This really grinds my gears as a doula. The reason the doctor is going to suggest induction is because they’re worried about shoulder dystocia- where the baby’s head is born then she gets “stuck” due to her broad shoulders. The problem is:

Ultrasounds are not accurate when it comes to baby’s size. It’s not an exact science and can be off by POUNDS when predicting your baby’s weight. 70% of shoulder dystocia cases occur with average or smaller than average babies. Not the big chunky ones! Why?

Baby fat squeezes 😇 Those extra pounds give baby some cushion when she’s coming down the birth canal. Gravity also plays a role in the ease of big baby birthing.

I highly encourage my clients to push back when they start talking induction. Inducing due to predicted size does not improve birth outcomes, yet we keep coercing tired, impatient, full term moms into consent. This is so wrong!

Your body is not a lemon. Your birth canal and vaginal opening can easily spread wide enough to birth your baby. Inductions are being grossly overused in our country. Inducing because of fear of something that could happen does not outweigh the downsides to induction. Inductions mean longer labors, more interventions, and higher probability of cesarean birth.

If your goal is a vaginal birth with little to no interventions I would recommend avoiding induction and never stop asking questions. This is YOUR birth! You deserve factual informed consent.

Did you know that you can interview your care provider early in pregnancy before selecting them as the one to provide prenatal care during your pregnancy and birth? That’s right, you have choices. You also have the right to ask any question you want about their birth philosophy, Cesarean section rates, their thoughts on pain medication, etc.. and request they take the time to answer them fully! In general, most Ob/Gyns and midwives have two different views on birth. Providers who take a medicine based approach believe birth is a medical event and can be quite dangerous. Holistic based providers believe birth is usually normal and most often very safe. It really matters the way your provider views birth because it shapes the way they will care for you during pregnancy. Are they willing to try more natural approaches like homeopathic or herbal remedies to deal with problems in pregnancy, or do they jump straight to medications and interventions? Selecting a provider who will take the time to listen to your questions and give you respect and support is the first step to having a satisfying birth experience. Not all doctors take the medicine based approach and not all midwives take a holistic approach- I’ve seen both on either side.

My goal as your doula is to empower you! You have rights and I encourage you to exercise them during your pregnancy and birth! This is your body, your baby, and your birth. Make sure whoever you choose to provide prenatal care is someone you trust, who respects you, and who will support you in your choices 💓

Not sure where to start? Let’s talk birth! As your doula I can help you compile a list of questions for your provider then go over the answers with you to help you decide if they are the right fit. Birth is not a one-size-fits all event and I will support you however you want it to happen!

Happy World Doula Week 2022! 🎉

Doulas all over the world improve the physiological, social, emotional, and psychological health of women, newborns and families in the birth and postpartum period!

I’m so grateful to be a doula and be able to share my passion for women and their babies 💓 Being able to be present as life enters the world is truly an honor. To my clients, thank you for allowing me to be a part of something so sacred in your life.

The Milk & Honey Doula updated their phone number.

Milk & Honey supports ALL birthing people, including teenage mothers. I’ve written a blog post on my thoughts surrounding young moms and I’d love for you to read it 💓

https://taylormarbury.wixsite.com/website/post/midwife-myths-debunked-understanding-the-alternative-way

Postpartum depression is something I take so seriously. Mothers who are experiencing PPD might feel shameful or like they are failing to “handle” the adjustment to parenthood. As your doula I will help you by giving resources for support groups, therapists, and book recommendations on how to cope. You DO NOT have to suffer.

Postpartum depression shouldn’t be confused with “baby blues”. Baby blues occurs within the first week after giving birth and can last 1-2 weeks. You may cry, feel irritable, and have sadness for no apparent reason. This is normal and it happens because of the extreme hormonal shifts that occur after you birth your baby.

Postpartum depression can be described as feelings of hopelessness, ongoing excessive crying, lashing out/irritability, withdraw, and difficulty bonding with your baby. In some extreme cases of PPD you might feel like you want to escape the situation and feel the need to harm yourself or your baby. If you’re feeling ANY of these emotions please please reach out to me or a loved one.

Postpartum mood disorders do not discriminate and it can affect any mom at any time. This does NOT make you a bad mom.

One way to encourage a healthy postpartum experience and to take care of yourself mentally is by hiring a postpartum doula. Currently M&H does not provide postpartum doula care, but as a birth worker I promise to be a safe space for you and I promise I will help you if you need it and I will never judge you, no matter how dark your thoughts may be.

Preparing for the arrival of your new baby has a long list of to-do’s. One very important item on that list should be a “postpartum care plan”. Talk to your partner about what postpartum will look like for both of you. Who will cook? Do laundry? Feed the baby? Make a sleep schedule and take turns if you can, so the both of you get adequate sleep.

And don’t forget, as challenging as the newborn phase can be IT WILL END. It’s only a phase. 💓

Take care of yourself mama. You’re not alone!

Clients ask me all the time, “If I have a supportive birth partner do I really need a Doula?”. Your birth partner is essential in providing support! No one knows you as well as your partner and they make unique contributions a Doula cannot. A Doula is there in addition to, not instead of, your partner! With a Doula present, the pressure on the partner is decreased and he can participate at his own comfort level. Dads often feel relieved when they can rely on a Doula for help; they enjoy the experience more!

For those partners who want to play a more active role, I will assist and guide them in effective ways to help you in labor. Partners other than fathers (lovers, friends, family members) also appreciate the Doula’s support, reassurance, and assistance!

I love supportive dads! We will work better together to give mom the very best birth team to achieve the very best birth 💓

Hey dads, I see you…YOU deserve a Doula!

Use by permission ACBE 2022

Okay, so this is really just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to why we feel discomfort in labor. So how is it possible that some women (myself included with my 10lb baby, Avery) feel relaxed and comfortable throughout labor? There’s a secret to comfortable labor and it starts with PREPARATION! Would you attempt to run a marathon race without training weeks or months beforehand? Of course not! The same goes with labor & childbirth.

I strongly encourage my clients to think about all of their choices for pain relief in labor, and if their goal is an unmedicated birth my best advice is to practice self-hypnosis starting at 20 weeks of pregnancy. Are you curious about how to have a comfortable birth? As your Doula I will work with you to teach you how this can be made your reality! My goal for all of my clients is to begin their labor feeling confident, calm, and prepared! And if things get hairy along the way you can feel safe knowing I have ALL the tricks and tips to remaining peaceful in labor. Even if self-hypnosis is not for you- there are TONS of ways we can use the mind body connection to give you the relaxing birth of your dreams! Want some inspiration on the power of self-hypnosis? I encourage you to read Avery’s birth story here:

https://www.hypnobabies.com/taylors-10-lb-hypno-baby-hospital-birth-story/

Your Doula loves you. You CAN do this!

The Milk & Honey Doula updated their business hours.

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Who needs a Doula? The short answer, everyone! Doulas aren’t just for your “crunchy granola” moms who prefer a more holistic approach, although that is an option. Doulas aren’t just for the families who are upper or middle class. Doulas aren’t just for moms who have never given birth! Doulas improve birth outcomes- that is a FACT. Doulas are for ANY woman who wants one!

Are you “that kind of mom”?

Let’s talk about your options for YOUR birth!
Epidural or medication free? IV drugs or Nitrous Oxide (laughing gas)? Hospital gown or your own clothes? Push on your side or on your hands and knees? Continuous fetal monitoring or intermittent? Breastfeed or bottle feed…or both? Can I labor in the tub? Can I eat while laboring? Circumcision or leave baby intact? Birth with lights on and music playing or in the quiet darkness with only the sounds of your powerful breaths? Vitamin K for baby or forgo the shot? Delayed cord clamping or cut it right away? And what the heck is the difference?!

SO. MANY. CHOICES.
And you get to decide, Mama. As your Doula I’ll give you all the facts and what to expect for your baby’s birth. Then you and your partner can decide what is best for YOUR family. I’m here to educate, support, and trust you.

“Birth is not only about making babies. Birth is about making mothers. Strong, competent, capable mothers who trust themselves and know their inner strength.” - Barbara Katz Rothman