Rays of Hope Children's Grief Centre

The words we use are important. While your intentions may be sincere, the choice of your words significantly impacts whether you are supportive of someone in their grief. Throughout this month, we hope you have learned what is helpful and unhelpful when talking to someone who is grieving. We encourage you to continue to by challenging typical grief expressions and sharing these alternative perspectives with others. When in doubt, honor the griever by offering support and truly listening when they share with you. 💙💚💛

When working with children and teens who are grieving, you can’t always know everything about them, and it is important not to assume either. These shifts in your language can create less potential for hurting the griever. 💙

Have you ever found yourself avoiding someone in grief because you weren’t sure about the best way to connect with them? This November, we are committed to flipping the typical grief scripts and, together, finding phrases to use when supporting someone who is grieving.

Instead of “Tell me what happened,” try ➡️ “Tell me about them.” Many people ask questions about our situations to find answers to the questions they may have, for example, whether this could happen to them. This is not appropriate and can cause hurt for the griever, who may not want to share. Focus instead on the person and less on the situation itself. There is space for the griever to share what is comfortable for them.

Have you ever wanted to express care and support but got caught up in your own fears about “saying the wrong thing”? This November, we are committed to on the things we say, finding phrases that are more supportive when talking to someone who is grieving.

Instead of “They’re in a better place,” “Everything happens for a reason,” or “At least they’re no longer in pain,” try ➡️ “When people die, they can leave a space in our life. What’s something that’s comforting right now?”

Our job as a support person is not to cheer up the griever. Acknowledging their feelings as valid and letting them know you are there to support them is showing up in the most meaningful way. 💙💚

Happy Thanksgiving! 🦃🍁✨
We are so thankful for our volunteers, families, & for the continued support of our community!
Today, we think about those who are missing a special person in their life. We know this can be a difficult time of year but we want you to know you are not alone! We send our love & warm wishes to you and your family!🧡

Have you ever thought about how to provide genuine support to a grieving friend? This November, we are committed to flipping the typical grief scripts and, together, finding phrases to use when supporting someone who is grieving.

Instead of “I bet this time of year is hard for you,” try ➡️ “Holidays can be hard after someone dies. How are you feeling about [holiday, anniversary, birthday]?” In general, it’s not helpful to assume how people are feeling. Respecting the individual means asking them.

To learn more about grief during the holidays, view the NACG Holiday Toolkit at https://indd.adobe.com/view/c3379af8-b35d-4ea3-aa85-92d43073ecf6.

Have you ever been in a position where you wanted to comfort someone who was grieving but didn’t know how to approach the conversation? This November, we are committed to on the things we say, finding phrases that are more supportive when talking to someone who is grieving.

Instead of “You must be so sad and really miss your person,” try ➡️ “I don’t know what you’re going through, but I want to listen if you want to share.”

Many people offer standard sympathy statements because death is hard to process, and it just feels uncomfortable. If you can be generous enough to allow the person to express some of what they’re going through, that moment of true sympathy may be of immense comfort.

Have you ever been in a situation where you felt unsure about what to say to someone who is grieving and wished you could find better words to express your support? This November, we are committed to flipping the typical grief scripts and, together, finding phrases to use when supporting someone who is grieving.

Instead of “Your [person] wouldn’t want you to be sad,” try ➡️ “It is okay that you are feeling sad. We can talk about it if you want.” Emotions, including strong emotions, are part of a normal grief experience. Saying the person’s sadness would disappoint the person who died can encourage people to hide their feelings, and speaking on behalf of the person can be incredibly hurtful. 💚

We felt the love today! Thank you to everyone who wore blue in honor of Children’s Grief Awareness Day! We are so thankful to be part of such a great community. Together we can continue to meet the unique needs of grieving kids and their families.💙🦋

Have you ever asked yourself, what can I do to really help a friend who is grieving? This November, we are committed to on the things we say, finding phrases that are more supportive when talking to someone who is grieving.
Instead of “How are you?”, try “i have been thinking about you. I wanted to check in and see how you were doing.” Offering support is a way of helping people feel connected and less alone. Being emotionally supportive is not always easy. View the NACG’s Listening Guide for tips on how to be a good listener and ways to care for yourself as you show up for others at the link in our bio. 💛

Have you ever been in a situation where you felt unsure about what to say to someone who is grieving and wished you could find better words to express your support? This November, we are committed to flipping the typical grief scripts and, together, finding phrases to use when supporting someone who is grieving.

Instead of “Your [person] wouldn’t want you to be sad,” try ➡️ “It is okay that you are feeling sad. We can talk about it if you want.” Emotions, including strong emotions, are part of a normal grief experience. Saying the person’s sadness would disappoint the person who died can encourage people to hide their feelings, and speaking on behalf of the person can be incredibly hurtful. 💛

Have you ever avoided somebody who is grieving because you weren’t sure what to say? This November, we are committed to flipping the typical grief scripts and, together, finding phrases to use when supporting someone who is grieving.

Instead of “I heard your [person] died. I’m sorry to hear that. I hope you are doing okay,” try ➡️ “I want you to know you can talk to me about this if you want to. I care about you and want to support you.” When you offer a space for someone to talk to you openly and honestly about their grief, you are showing up for them in the most meaningful way.

To learn more about how to be a good listener in the moments of offering support, view the NACG Listening Guide at https://indd.adobe.com/view/d00c9d93-bcf2-4883-9a13-deb9af3fe03a. 💙

Have you ever wished you could overcome the discomfort of talking to someone about their grief and find the words to provide support? This November, we are committed to on the things we say, finding phrases that are more supportive when talking to someone who is grieving.
Instead of “You need to be strong” try - “You might feel like you need to be strong, but you don’t have to be with me.” Telling someone to “be strong” when they are hurting may leave them feeling like they are weak when they are vulnerable and experiencing normal emotions after the death of their person. Learn more about the campaign at nacg.org/ flipthescript. 💚💙

Have you ever engaged in a conversation with someone who was grieving, only to find yourself at a loss for words? This November, we are committed to flipping the typical grief scripts and, together, finding phrases to use when supporting someone who is grieving.

Instead of “Shouldn’t you be over grieving by now? The death happened a while ago,” try ➡️ “How is your grief feeling right now?”.

Grief is messy – it doesn’t follow any expected pattern and is different for everyone. Expectations about how someone should think or feel may leave them feeling that they are somehow not grieving correctly. Take some time to read this article by the Dougy Center on Understanding Grief: https://www.dougy.org/get-involved/join-in/understandgrief/call-to-action.

Have you ever felt awkward or uncomfortable talking to a friend who is grieving and wished you could find the right words? This November, we are committed to on the things we say, finding phrases that are more supportive when talking to someone who is grieving.

Instead of “I completely get what you’re going through,” try ➡️ “Grief is different for everyone. What has it been like for you?”.

Offering someone your own experience and saying, “I know how you feel,” may seem comforting, but claiming to know before gaining a true understanding of the person’s unique perspective minimizes their experience. Always check in and ask yourself, “Am I focusing on the person’s experience or my own grief?”. 💚💛💙

Many of the things we say when trying to comfort someone who is grieving can be well-intentioned but also distancing. This November, we are committed to flipping the typical grief scripts and, together, finding phrases to use when supporting someone who is grieving.
Instead of “I’m sorry for your loss.” try - “I know there are no words to make it better. Just know that I’m here and want to support you however I can.” This phrase can make the bereaved person feel isolated at a moment when they need connection. Try putting the focus on the griever’s experience to ensure your support is more meaningful and resonant.
Take some time to read this webpage by on Go Beyond I’m Sorry: https://experiencecamps.org/ talkaboutgrief or at the link in our bio.

A big thank you to all our Par for the Course sponsors. We couldn’t have done this without you!

Start spooky season with us!🎃🍭
Join us next week for our Family Night Costume Party. We will have games, fun halloween activities, and caaandy!
Don’t have a costume?? That’s okay!! Come join the fun, we will have costume props available during the night.

Don't miss out on a SPOOKtacular night!
~This event is open to the public~
For more information or to RSVP email [email protected]

Thank you to our Eagle on the Fairway sponsors! We are so thankful for each of you!

Thank you to our Birdies on the Green sponsors. We are grateful for you! .bank

We had such a successful fundraiser last Saturday! Thank you to our sponsors who helped make this possible. Thank you .usa.fcu for sponsoring the event, providing our shirts, and donating and cooking all the food. We appreciate you!

We love supporting small businesses and we are so thankful they are supporting us! In this bundle you can win a package, auto detailing from , pickles, nuts, jam and more from , four sets of earrings from Craft Mom, and a spa credit to The Getaway Spa at the MCM Eleganté

This is the ultimate man raffle! A custom made knife from will be so useful on your hog hunt at LeGrand Headwaters Ranch. Tomorrow is your chance to win!

Shout out to the for class passes and open gym time! Your little one is sure to enjoy this basket of activities to keep them busy!

Thank you for the FIVE Deluxe Passes! We paired them with a scooter and games donated by some committee members to make this fun basket of goodies!

We are so excited to have this Nintendo Switch package at our raffle this weekend! Includes Special Edition Zelda Switch, case, game, shirt, hat, figures and two Nintendo bags all purchased from the Time Square location. Thanks so much to a very generous donor this could be yours Saturday.

Thank you to for several passes to come back to play mini golf ⛳️ We mixed them in 2 gift baskets full of toys any boy or girl would like.

Pamper yourself with a 5 piece set from .midland while at your stay at You can wear your new necklace to the included brunch the next morning. Don’t forget Kendra Scott will have a pop up at the fundraiser giving back 20% of sales to Rays of Hope.

Do you have a little artist at home? This raffle basket is for them 🎨🖌️ We have paint, pastels, markers, brushes, canvases, sketch pads, an easel, and donated a free month of class.

Who enjoys med spas? Thanks to you could win a $1500 voucher during our raffle Saturday.

Thanks to a generous committee member we will have these AirPod Max Wireless Headphones in our raffle this Saturday!

Who wants a chance to win $500 to ? Join us this Saturday at Hope on the Green and enter the raffle!!

Thank you for you generous donation!

Tickets can still be purchased at https://hospiceofmidland-bloom.kindful.com/e/hope-on-the-green

Who’s ready for a sneak peek of raffle items?! First up is this amazing baseball package from Package includes shirts, bobble head, towel, stadium approved tote bag, and TWENTY tickets to the 2024 season!

Join us September 16th anytime between 11-3 at for your chance to win this this raffle package or many others!

If you have been through or currently going through any of our programs we want you to play mini golf with us at Hope on the Green at Green Acres. If you would like FREE tickets please DM us or call 432-684-5437. Thank you to our many generous donors for making this possible!!

We now have a flyer for our fundraiser Hope on the Green! If you would like some printed to hang in your office please message us and we will be happy to drop some off to you.

https://hospiceofmidland-bloom.kindful.com/e/hope-on-the-green for tickets.

We are so excited that Kendra Scott will be hosting a pop-up at our fundraiser September 16th at Green Acres. 20% of proceeds will be given back to Rays of Hope. If you haven't purchased your tickets yet get them now https://hospiceofmidland.org/hope-on-the-green