The Delaware Counseling Center

Identifying mothers who are at risk for Preeclampsia is a game changer for both providers and patients. I would welcome your thoughts!

A Blood Test Predicts Preeclampsia in Pregnant Women The Food and Drug Administration has approved a blood test that can identify pregnant women who are at imminent risk of developing a severe form of high blood pressure called preeclampsia, a leading cause of disability and death among childbearing women. The condition disproportionately affects Blac...

It’s a great time to be part of the DE community! Thanks to our Delaware chapter of Postpartum Support International’s Advocacy Lead, Laura Najemy’s, intensive email campaign, our chapter met with 15+ state legislators to discuss the expansion of screening for 'maternal depression' to perinatal mood and anxiety disorders and we brainstormed on what state agency can administrate requested training funds. My colleague, Megan O'Hara, from Christiana Care’s Center for Women’s Emotional Wellness, was honored for her years of service and the Senate and House passed the resolution to make tomorrow, May 5, 2023, Maternal Mental Health Awareness Day!! ,

Endometriosis is one of the leading causes of infertility, yet many women are innocently walking around assuming their pain is normal. Take a look at this well done article from Delaware Today magazine that featured a local surgeon from RADfertility.

What to Know About Endometriosis, According to a Delaware Expert Endometriosis can cause pain and even infertility. Here, a Delaware expert explains symptoms, treatments and when to speak to your doctor.

March is Pregnancy After Loss Awareness Month. There are so many misconceptions about what has been captured as “Rainbow Pregnancies,” and I think this article is a great place to start learning about how to better understand someone you love if s/he pregnant again.

It's Pregnancy After Loss Awareness Month—Here Are 10 Things You Might Not Realize About Pregnancy After Loss March is Pregnancy After Loss Awareness Month. And because becoming pregnant again after losing a baby is complicated, it can be hard to understand, specifically if you haven't experienced loss yourself. In an effort to bring awareness to an often misunderstood experience, here are 10 things unique....

Friends of PSI Delaware,

As a Delaware based nonprofit, we are thrilled to announce that we are participating in DoMore 24 Delaware/ Delaware Gives, a statewide giving campaign March 2nd-3rd. Our efforts throughout the state are made possible through donations from individuals like you. With fewer foundations, smaller grants and formerly localized investments now leaving the state, the impact you have is more important than ever. Can you imagine what life would be like for new families in Delaware if the work we do stopped tomorrow?

The community you care about relies on your support to help us:
• Provide free or low cost perinatal specific mental health education to therapists and prescribers who treat moms in Delaware.
• Provide an awesome Climb Out of the Darkness, a day where we were able to pamper over 100 new moms last year, while providing resources and education for their wellbeing.
• Advocate for perinatal mental health initiatives in the Delaware legislature, an effort where we've been making significant progress this year.

But the future of the work we do is not at all assured. We must do more! We must work together to ensure the continuation of the critical services that make Delaware a safe, special, and sustainable home for future generations. For 24 hours from 6 p.m. March 2nd through 6 p.m. March 3rd we’re asking you to do more with us. Please give to Do More 24 Delaware.

Here is our direct link for donations: https://www.domore24delaware.org/fundraisers/postpartum-support-international-delaware. We look forward to your donation on March 2nd and 3rd. Thanks in advance for your support!

It has been quite quiet on my FB site, and I hope to post an update about that soon. But for now, I am bursting at the seams with excitement for this much-needed resource for grieving families in DE. As a community, we are really lacking proper bereavement resources for parents. The space is just perfect and if I could have hand-picked the people to bring this vision to life, Stacey Smith would have been at the top of my list. Please scan the QR code to help them collect data on what we need!

We are just one month away from one of my favorite days of the year - it is a day that is filled with so much emotion for me. October 15th is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day, a day that mothers, fathers, grandparents and friends come together in unity to honor all of our babies that have left this earth too soon. At 7pm EST, we will light a candle and send a wave of light across the globe. Although I am still very ill, I hope to attend the Wave of Light in person as my husband and I honor our baby, “A,” who we lost nearly 20 years ago. Will you join me?

The Lifeline and 988


Today is the official start of access to the Su***de Lifeline by dialing 988. To read more you can visit https://988lifeline.org/current-events/the-lifeline-and-988
When people call, text, or chat 988, they will be connected to trained counselors that are part of the existing National Su***de Prevention Lifeline network. These trained counselors will provide support and connect them to resources if necessary.

The current Lifeline phone number (1-800-273-8255) will always remain available to people in emotional distress or suicidal crisis, even after 988 is launched nationally.

The Lifeline and 988 988 has been designated as the new three-digit dialing code that will route callers to the National Su***de Prevention Lifeline. While some areas may be currently able to connect to the Lifeline by dialing 988, this dialing code will be available to everyone across the United States starting on July...

As Mother’s Day approaches, please consider the women in your life who are experiencing profound sadness today. As you share your Facebook worthy pictures, keep in mind that your sister may be silently suffering through her first round of IVF, your colleague may have just lost a much desired pregnancy, and your boss may have just lost their mother.

Every year, people ask me what they can do to support grieving mothers on Mother’s Day. This year, I would like to hear from YOU! How can we support YOU on Mother’s Day?

My #1 recommendation is “Acknowledge they ARE a mother. Say their baby’s name!

Think about HOW you can honor your wife, friend or colleague who is struggling on Mother’s Day.

April 25th is the first day of National Infertility Awareness Week. Infertility is one of the most isolating, lonely and humbling journeys. Yet when someone struggling with infertility meets another person who is also struggling, there becomes an instant bond. Suddenly you become part of a silent sisterhood or brotherhood that you never wanted to join. But walking alongside your sisters and brothers means you are never actually walking alone.

I began my own journey in the fertility world over 20 years ago, and I am proud to be known as one of the veteran fertility counselors in the DE/PA/MD area. Over the past 2 decades I have learned that people who are new to this world want to know your secrets for survival and they also want to know your story!

So, please tell us! What were the hardest parts of building your family? How did you survive?

This article is not centered around Covid, but the added pressures on couples living through Covid has left many people considering whether or not they still have the same familial goals as their partners. Stressors, including financial changes and a lack of personal space and autonomy, have left both men and women questioning their compatibility, especially when it comes to raising children. What I have found is that the answer is not necessarily black and white, but rather layers to explore in therapy.

https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2020/07/my-husband-doesnt-want-another-kid-so-im-considering-divorce/614524/

Dear Therapist: My Husband Doesn’t Want Another Kid, so I’m Considering Divorce I don’t know that I would ever be able to forgive him for taking this away from me.

This is great news and a step closer to reducing both maternal and infant mortality!

Maternal Health Day of Action

The White House hosted its first ever Maternal Health Summit earlier this week. Vice President Kamala Harris issued a nationwide call to action to help improve health outcomes for parents and infants in the United States.
The administration announced new commitments to support safe pregnancies and childbirth, and reduce complications and mortality in the year following birth. This means:

Encouraging states to expand postpartum coverage from 60 days to 12 months through their Medicaid programs

Creating a new designation of the quality of maternal health services for our nation’s hospitals

Investing $3 billion in maternal health after the Build Back Better Act becomes law

Repost from The Today Show. Excellent article that showcases what women really need when they are having a miscarriage.

https://www.today.com/parents/miscarriage-friendship-post-goes-viral-t235916

Viral post shows what friendship after miscarriage looks like Sometimes, "let me know if you need anything" doesn't cut it. That's when you need a friend like Anna Quinlan.

My name is Spencer Brown, and I am a fifth-year doctoral student at the Philadelphia College of Osteopathic Medicine (PCOM). I am recruiting women to participate in my dissertation study. This study investigates a woman’s beliefs, coping styles, and thoughts about infertility.

To participate in this study, you must be biologically female, between the ages of 18-45 and be experiencing infertility or reproductive challenges for at least 12 months or longer. This is an anonymous, voluntary study, and you may drop out at any time. The survey will take about 20-30 minutes to complete. Participants who complete the study may enter a raffle. Two people will be chosen at random to win a $50 Visa gift card. This raffle is separate from the survey and participants will not be able to be identified. This raffle will not be linked to the survey data. This study has been approved by the Philadelphia College of Osteopathic Medicine IRB (protocol -001X). Please follow the link to be directed to the online research study. Questions about the survey can be directed to Dr. Barbara Golden at [email protected]

https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/exploringfemaleinfertility

Thank you!
Spencer Brown, MA
Psychology Doctoral Candidate
Philadelphia College of Osteopathic Medicine

Exploring Female Infertility Take this survey powered by surveymonkey.com. Create your own surveys for free.

As we prepare for the annual Wave of Light, I am going to leave this right here. ALL of these losses are so painful. No matter what type of loss you have experienced, there will always be something or someone missing.

Repost from NAMI! This slide is old but it is still helpful to see.

Working as a counselor has shown me that every single person that has experienced infertility and loss has reported some degree of anxiety and depression, and nearly 100% of bereaved parents also meet criteria for PTSD. So why do you think there is such secrecy and shame that is associated with mental illness? Why aren’t we talking about how NORMAL it is?

img.buzzfeed.com

Please join me, the folks Hank's Hope Inc. and ’s Light as we celebrate and honor our babies and bring awareness to pregnancy and infant loss. The 4th Annual Wave of Light will be hosted on the terrace of the DuPont Country Club on October 15. Please see the link below for details. If you can not join us in person, please note that you can have your baby’s name read in person and I will be present to honor them.

Register for the 2021 Wave of Light As a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization, donations to Hank’s Hope Inc. are tax deductible to the fullest extent of the law.

The sun was shining at the annual TEARS Foundation’s Rock & Walk, but the high temps didn’t come close to what REALLY warmed my heart. After 18 months of doing telehealth, I masked up and got to put my arms around so many people who mean the world to me. Some I have known for over a decade, and others who have walked beside me every year since the DE chapter’s event was started by 3 incredible, bereaved mothers who believed that every family should be able to bury or cremate their son or daughter. It is a day to pause and honor our angels who were taken too soon. Here is a sneak peak to my amazing day. Thank you to everyone who donated to our team, Nikki’s Angel Babies. I am proud to report our team raised over $4100.00! 💜💙💜💙💜💙

Please see the schedule of events for tomorrow. In the past few days, over 1/4 of my regular team members have been diagnosed with Covid. It is imperative that we keep our distance, which goes against the whole vibe of the TEARS Walk. If you have any symptoms, please stay home!

This will be the 4th year that I sponsor a team with the Delaware Chapter of the TEARS Foundation. Over the past two decades, I have joined mothers and fathers who have experienced the worst pain of their lives - losing a child. For some of my patients, their loss was at 10 weeks, often after years of fertility treatment. For others, their loss was a perfectly healthy full-term baby. Regardless of how you lost your baby, the pain is horrific. I am honored to have guided hundreds of couples through the darkest parts of their journey, as they learn how to live with a giant hole in their heart.
Prior to Covid, our team, Nikki's Angel Babies, was the largest team in Delaware. Our team consisted of grandparents, colleagues, parents and their rainbow babies too. Regardless of whether your loss was 2 weeks ago, or 20 years ago, we walk in solidarity. The Rock & Walk is not just a time to honor your son or daughter, but it is a place where you walk alongside other parents who understand your tears and the depths of your grief. I would love for you to join us at the Caravel Academy track on Saturday, September 18th from 1-4, as our team, Nikki's Angel Babies, unites and walks together as we all honor our babies.
There is not a day that goes by that I do not consider what my life would have been if I had not lost a baby. I am not just walking as a therapist, but I, too, am an angel mom. On September 18, I will still be walking in honor of your baby, but I will also be walking in honor of my Baby "A", who would be turning 16 one week after the walk.
Please consider donating through this link. It is a safe, secure system and anything you contribute will go directly to supporting parents with a financial need who have lost a baby.
https://give.thetearsfoundation.org/fundraiser/3377192

Fundraising for The TEARS Foundation Thanks for visiting my fundraising page!

Honoring all of the people in our lives who have been blessed with a rainbow baby. This term was created to give meaning to how precarious and precious a pregnancy is after you have experienced a miscarriage or stillbirth.

https://give.thetearsfoundation.org/team/371107

This will be the 4th year that I "walk" in honor of all of the incredible mothers and fathers who chose me to help them through the most difficult event in their lives - losing a child. For the past 2 decades, I have focused my private practice on pregnancy and infant loss. This event, the Tears Foundation's Rock & Walk, is powerful and moving. I would LOVE to have you join my team, or donate to my team on behalf of someone you love. I will be walking in honor of so many babies, but most importantly, my own Baby "A."

Who will you honor?

** Through August 15, please use the code HOPE21 to receive 50% off you personalized shirts!

Check out Nikki's Angel Babies' team fundraising page for The TEARS Foundation Nikki's Angel Babies would love for you to join our team as we raise awareness about pregnancy and infant loss and celebrate our angel babies who received their wings.

Please welcome my friend and collegue, Katie Madden, as my guest columnist this week. Katie is a well-known breastfeeding guru, who consistently incorporates mental health and wellbeing into her work as a lactation consultant.

Warning - This could be a trigger for angel moms as it discusses breastfeeding and PMADs.

In May, we raise awareness about and honor those of us who have experienced what is often referred to as postpartum or postpartum depression. The maternal mental health community has realized that the scope of mental health disorders is more complex than depression and has adopted the more inclusive phrase: Perinatal Mood and Anxiety Disorder (PMADs).

PMADs include postpartum depression as well as mental health issues that occur during pregnancy and postpartum anxiety.

Perinatal: Pregnancy through 1 year postpartum
Mood: Depression and bipolar disorder
Anxiety: GAD, Panic, OCD, PTSD
Disorders

Some hard facts...
81.9% initiate breastfeeding nationally (76% in our sweet little state of DE).
PMADs affects 15-20% (that we know of).
PMADs is the number one complication of childbirth yet there is NO universal screening in most practices.
To give you a comparison, gestation diabetes and pregnancy induced hypertension combined affects less than 10% of pregnant parents. We are sure to test for those, aren’t we?
Breastfeeding and PMADs
A person who fails to meet their breastfeeding goals or who is suffering through breastfeeding is at a higher risk for PMADs.

(perception of) FAILURE = DEPRESSION

A person who has ni**le pain is at a higher risk for depression.
At least one in five lactating parents report persistent pain at two months postpartum and are at a significantly higher risk for depression.
Parents with pain in the first day, first week, and second week were more likely to be depressed at two months postpartum.
Up to 50% of those who quit breastfeeding earlier than planned cite ni**le pain the primary reason.

PAIN = DEPRESSION

A parent who is sleep deprived is at a higher risk for postpartum depression (i.e. those told to breastfeed, bottle feed, and pump every two hours around the clock).

SLEEP DEPRIVATION = DEPRESSION

Pain is real and it matters. If a parent is having persistent ni**le pain past 10 days postpartum, it should be considered abnormal and they should be referred to an IBCLC.

It is important we understand breastfeeding goals, then help to reframe those goals to be more realistic. The current age of “exclusivity” fuels the unquenchable thirst for perfection so many parents today have.

Mother’s Day is the single most difficult day of the year for women struggling with both infertility and loss. Here are some of the ways you can help a family member or friend who is struggling to build her family.

1. Call or text to remind her that you are thinking of her today. Simply acknowledge that you understand today will be difficult for her.

2. If she has lost a child, wish her a Happy Mother’s Day. There is NO stronger mother than one who has buried her baby or injects herself with 175 needles for 2 years of IVF cycles.

3. Be sensitive to her needs! I will never forget a fertility patient sobbing as she told me a story of her father getting corsages on Mother’s Day for each of the mothers in his life. She was the only woman in her family without one. It gutted her.

4. Having a Mother’s Day brunch? Do not guilt her if she does not want to celebrate with you this year. But DO include her in your plans, and allow her to gracefully decline.

5. ASK how you can support her! Do not assume that NOT talking about her fertility struggles or loss is the best course of action. A lot of bereaved moms DO want to talk about their loss - especially today.

6. Just listen to what she needs today and do not try to convince her otherwise. It is perfectly fine if she wants to stay in bed all day, skip dinner or go to bed at 7pm.

7. Consider carving an hour out of your day to go with her to a fancy bar, nail salon or movie that will likely be child-free.

8. Pray for and with her. I will never forget the times I went to church and the pastor asked all of the mothers to stand up. The congregation claps, honoring all of these women, some of whom had 4+ children next to them . About 5 years ago, the woman next to me remained seated, with tears just dripping down her face. I will never forget that moment.

9. Do not tell her to “relax, eat frozen pineapple cores, eat more turmeric, or just be patient.” DO encourage your friend to make an appointment with a reproductive endocrinologist if she has been trying to conceive for 6 months with no success.

10. Say her baby’s name. Most women who have lost a child will share that the one of the hardest parts of being a bereaved mother is when the world moves and “forgets” their son or daughter. She will NEVER move on. Instead, she will learn how to put one step in front of the other and function with a big hole in her heart. She is a mother, and will always be a mother. 💙💜💙💜💙💜

****LEGISLATIVE UPDATE****

PSI-DE has been working to support a joint Senate and House resolution to recognize May 5 as Maternal Mental Health Awareness Day. Senator Kyle Evans Gay and Representative Krista Griffith are championing this effort. The resolution includes recommendations for legislative action to improve insurance coverage, childcare solutions, training for more mental health providers, promoting trauma informed care in health care systems caring for women and better parental leave policies, among other things.

Please contact your legislators and let them know you want this resolution passed. You can tune in online to see Sen. Gay present the resolution to the Senate on April 28 (log in day of to see what time) and Rep. Griffith present to the House on April 29. This is very exciting and I’d like to thank Black Mothers in Power, BlackBrownDelawareTherapists, and Delaware Psychological Association for supporting this effort together.

http://legis.delaware.gov/watchandlisten

Bbdt Directory, Black Mothers in Power, Malina Spirito, Jenna Mahoney, Elizabeth Sproesser Fiechter, Amy Ellen Didden, Jimena Jolley, and Anne Michelle

Watch And Listen - Delaware General Assembly Stream live legislative chamber proceedings and committee meetings on demand anytime, anywhere. Archived live streams are available as well. Supported browsers are Microsoft Edge, Chrome, Mozilla Firefox and Safari.

Today is day 2 of National Infertility Awareness Week. You are MORE than just a fertility patient! Tell me what else is awesome about you. I think I bring to the table a ton of empathy and unconditional support, both in and out of my office. What do you bring to the table besides being a patient?

Today is the first day of National Infertility Awareness Week. Let’s use social media to raise awareness! Today’s challenge is to get “reel!” Post a video or tiktok about how infertility affects you!

Repost from RADfertility!

IT'S OFFICIAL! National Infertility Awareness Week has been officially proclaimed in Delaware! Thank you Governor Carney and RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association! 🧡