Joanne Koegl, Marriage, Family Therapist

Emotional and amazing speeches! I love the Obama’s and “better angels exist”. 🙏🏻

It’s 4 years today since you have hopefully joined in a beautiful place we have no idea. You were a second mother to me and many in the family. Happy Mother’s Day and I think of you all the time. I miss your silly faces and you sneaking Joey your food. ❤️ I am spoiling him for you! 🌻❤️

“Mom…this weather makes me sleepy”. 😍

Last of one month celebration for my 30h birthday (lol)!! There are no words to describe how utterly grateful, touched, overwhelmed, blessed, ecstatic…. I am for the love bestowed on me. This is not boasting but I want to yell out such a huge THANK YOU to my family and friends for New York, dinners, plays, calls, and this weekend with 8 people that all got along so well and we had a blast!!!! Love you…my heart and soul are beyond full and I never take for granted for my life line of peeps!! ❤️😘😍🙏🏻

Just the start of a fun filled weekend celebration with the most loving friends…I am so overwhelmed! 😘

Not my Halloween costume but last day of Breast Cancer Awareness. Getting my bi-annual mammogram and Ultrasound. Please make your appointments. 🩷

Channeling my beloved mom. She was 18 in this photo and so much more beautiful but it was an honor. Missing making memories with her but we have so many to remember.

They are not just statistics 💔♥️

Have Heavenly Birthday Babe! I cherish our time together and thank you for the lessons and strength you continue to teach me.

Can you spare a minute to help Joanne Diaz- Koegl? 1,270 signatures are still needed! Amend the No Surprises Act of 2022 regarding Private Practice Mental Health Clinicians

“This is your life. You're allowed to change your mind. To change your heart. You're allowed to be a different person. To wake up one day and not want to do the things you've been doing all your life. You're allowed to love who you want. To move on from the people who are not good to you. To let go of anyone without any kind of explanation. Without any kind of regret. You're allowed to make mistakes. To learn from them. Or not to learn from them and experience everything all over again. You're allowed to forget your past if you want to. Or to stay in it but you must also understand that this is not how you will grow. You're allowed to change careers. To dress differently. To chase different dreams. To change locations, even if, at first, you're terrified to do so. You're allowed to dislike yourself but also allowed to change those same parts you don't see eye to eye with. To work on them until you're completely comfortable with who you are. This is your life. Make it count. Make your own validation. Your own path. Your own way of life. You are enough. And you are not broken. You're a lot stronger than you want to believe. Now breathe."

Beautiful words by R.M.Drake
Exquisite art by

Note to clients. So true.

Too funny

We all need to take care of our mental health.

After some time away from my professional website, I am back. Use your wounds to be priceless by helping others what one has learned.

Now it's easier to call Joanne Koegl, Marriage, Family Therapist.

Listen to my podcast where I talk about my personal experience with Covid and help on how to navigate grief and loss.

Good article on the collective grief most of us are trying to work through.

https://www.wellandgood.com/
grief-debt/amp/

We’re All Accumulating 'Grief Debt' Right Now—Will We Ever Be Able to Repay It? Grief and trauma experts explain how experiencing waves of tragedy is different than one singular traumatic event, and how we can heal.

Great article from a teen Line on how many teens are suffering mentally with the pandemic. All our lives have been interrupted, I wish for everyone to receive their vaccine when it is your time. This pandemic has not only devastated physically but also mentally in unknown numbers. Everyday call someone just to let them know you care.

The loneliness of an interrupted adolescence Think being a teenager was rough? Try doing it in a pandemic.

Dr. Bergman’s story is so tragic but sadly of one many children, young adults dying from fentanyl overdose. The pandemic has had many home bored, spending more time getting into websites that entice young curiosity and experimentation. Please be aware of what is available on social media. He ordered online to have Xanex ( a controlled substance, a benzodiazepine) delivered to his home. The pill was laced with the often fatal fentanyl and he was unaware. The deaths through fentanyl are climbing exponentially and we need to be proactive. He, like others had a whole life ahead of him.

Dr. Laura Berman speaks out about son’s overdose death Dr. Laura Berman and her husband Sam tell NBC News’ Kate Snow their 16-year-old son died of an overdose after a drug dealer connected with him on Snapchat.

I am grateful that Anderson Cooper took a moment to address the losses of 2020. Society has always shied away when loss and grief happens but this year we have been forced to face it more then ever. The more we talk about it the less you feel alone. We are all thinking about it just by watching the news. In talking our feelings we feel less alone and the fear is not as great.

I know I had lots of support through texts and social media which meant the world to me but phone calls were few because people just don’t know what to say. It’s nobodies fault other then the taboo we have been raised with on death. You aren’t expected to fix anything, it’s not contagious, it’s uncomfortable, but acknowledging the loss, helps immensely the grieving process. With Covid it has been exceptionally harder on the families of the lost loved ones because there were no visits to the hospital, no in person goodbyes, no comforting hugs from family and friends, no services or forced to have virtual services, the pain and anger felt from the naysayers, and especially after 10 months California is seeing the highest numbers of illness and deaths due to this virus.

When one has experienced certain challenges in our lives, we are much more empathic, we walk the walk. Anderson said what so many of us were feeling especially sharing about his father.

Dismally, we still have some time to deal with Covid and the ramifications on mental health are great. Our healthcare workers are on auto pilot but I see a deluge of battle fatigue in the coming months.

If you have suffered loss, please turn to someone that understands. If you are a friend that knows of someone that has had loss, let them know you care... a simple hello, drop off a card, flowers, a meal, etc. Connection and hugs are the best but unfortunately we can’t do it now which complicates this grief more. Let’s be here for each other .

Anderson Cooper's heartwarming message to those grieving loved ones - CNN Video CNN's Anderson Cooper takes a moment during the New Year's Eve Live special to talk about losing his father as a young boy, empathizing with those that lost loved ones in 2020.

Wishing you all a happy, healthy, hopeful, loving, kind, and peaceful 2021. I know that 2020 was the most difficult year ever but I know how much you learned about your strength!

Please Stop Minimizing the Death of Older Adults % Grief related to the death of older adults is often minimized. This leads to grieving loved ones experiencing disenfranchised grief.

Thank you Super Mamas (Bricia and Paulina) for having me talk on your Podcast about the grief and loss we are collectively feeling with COVID-19. Grief is not a subject we like to talk about but right now we all are experiencing so many feelings that are difficult to put into words. It’s important to normalize loss and the importance of grieving for our physical and mental health. Listen on or wherever you find your podcasts🎧

I so agree with this article. Enough pressure with obtaining!! Everyone grieves differently and being gentle with yourself is most important. Stay home. Stay well!

A trauma psychologist weighs in on the risks of 'motivational' pressure during quarantine "As a trauma psychologist, I am utterly utterly horrified, enraged, and bewildered about how people can believe and spread this phrase in good conscience."

SURVIVING MANY LOSSES DURING COVID-19

As I try to navigate this uncertain time in our lives I realized what we are feeling universally is grief from so many losses. I wrote my Thesis in 2004 on Loss and Grief and the Stages of Grief. People all over the world are experiencing emotions that many of us have never felt or often ran from. When I do my presentations on loss, I often speak of as of how we are a society of attainment and that it’s not in our culture to speak about loss. We are a society of attainment and do not talk much about loss. Now we are all experiencing a magnitude of losses and struggling with the emotions we are feeling. Many of us who have experienced the loss of loved ones know that tidal wave of feelings from denial to acceptance. In her book, (“On Death and Dying”), Psychiatrist Elizabeth Kubler-Ross discusses the five stages of grief, also known as the “Kubler-Ross model”. The stages are cyclical not linear, they are denial, anger, depression, bargaining

With the uncertainly of the Coronavirus and the world economy many are grieving. We have lost the certainty that many of us took for granted. Suddenly the world has changed and we are hearing that we will return to a “new” normal which can cause anticipatory grief. Anticipatory grief is the name given to the tumultuous set of feelings and reactions that occur in some people who are expecting the death of a loved one. So not only are we grieving what we have lost but what we may lose, the unknown. The unknown often causes anxiety.

It’s wonderful that we are discovering new things about ourselves and our neighbors. I get teary when I read the wonderful ways people are helping each other. I firmly believe in living in the moment, mindfulness, and positivity, but I get concerned that as a nation we have been brought up to be stoic and to “buck up”.

I don’t think that in our lifetime we have ever experienced this type of universal grief. The pandemic attacking our globe has not only made us concern about our health but also created an awareness of the possible other losses we value. Things we took for granted like hugging, shaking hands, physical interaction, sharing a meal, going out, going to church services, buying anything at the market (especially toilet paper), wedding, birthday celebrations, car washes, gyms, medical services, routines, etc., have been suddenly taken away and we are left to figure out…WHAT AM I FEELING? Many may not recognize these new feelings and can feel alone in their thoughts.

I hear people describe their feelings as anger, fear, sadness, rage, blame, helplessness, denial, etc., these are all stages of grief. We cannot run away from grief. We must go through it and face it head on. We are experiencing feelings that need acknowledgment and validation. Left unrecognized and unattended, grief can impact our mental and physical health. We often feel guilty to talk about our feelings when we compare ourselves to others who may be worse off. We can’t compare ourselves to anyone but ourselves. Our reality is our reality and we all have different coping mechanisms.

Coping skills, such as meditations, prayer, help us ease these feelings temporarily, but we also honor our grief, and should not push it away. Grief is real, the more we push it away, the more it persists. One does not have to grieve 24/7, yet often allowing some time and space to examine your feelings can be therapeutic. It can be as simple as talking with a friend or family member about your feelings.

I am offering beginning Wednesday, April 1, 2020 two free support groups with a maximum of 15 people per group for 3 weeks. Please see flyer for dates and times. During these sessions I will facilitate the group in a safe environment so you can share your thoughts and feelings without judgement. I will also offer tools to help you when you feel overwhelmed. We are in this together.

Please email me if you are interested to get on the list and I will provide you with the Zoom I.D. to join. I am also available via Telehealth if you would like to schedule a personal session at my normal rate.






















MARCH 29, 2020
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