Kristen Sobkowiak, LMHC, MHP, SUDP

Hallie Burchinal, Executive Director at Compassionate Addiction Treatment, shares a statement in response to Mayor Nadine Woodward's press conference this week.

I can’t tell you how many relationships I have seen come to an end because one (or both) people involved didn’t know how to acknowledge or take responsibility for their hurtful behavior.

This can be hard stuff to lean into when we haven’t seen it modeled properly for us.
It can be challenging to offer accountability to people if we struggle to sit with and regulate feelings of shame.

Nonetheless, leaning towards accountability is a skill I invite all of us to learn to cultivate more of in our relationships.

Accountability is often the bridge we have to walk across to take us from disconnection to connection again.

It is the entry point that can re-establish safety and trust, when safety and trust have been injured or damaged.

What did accountability look like amongst the adults you grew up with?

How did the adults in your life show accountability towards you?

How were mistakes/hurt feelings repaired?

How did you know when connection and trust was restored?

How were your mistakes approached and held?

How were feelings of shame managed?

What is your experience with offering accountability in your relationships now?

How do manage any feelings of shame, guilt, remorse that can come up?

If you struggle to offer accountability, what gets in the way for you?

What might you be trying to hold onto or protect yourself from feeling/experiencing?

Accountability is a big one.

And it has to be shared.

It has to be offered in a mutual way so that both people can reap the healing and the long-term benefits of it💙🙏🏻

~ Silvy Khoucasian

Good to know!

This is a great, compassionate understanding g of internal reactions to other's boundary-making

Sure, when anger takes over, it can be destructive. But when anger is suppressed, we miss out on her important messages (and that means we might stay in harmful situations a lot longer than we need to).

In the arena of boundaries, anger is (surprise!) a wonderful helper when used constructively.

Not put in charge but also not stuffed down, anger can then provide us with important emotional signals that let us know when boundaries are being violated.

We can then use that information to explore what (and where) the boundary violation might be.

Usually, it’s in one of three spots.

1. The violation might be on our end.

In that case, it’s often an indication that we are minding someone else’s business.

Oops! 😳

Now we can fix that (which may need to include an apology for overstepping).

2. On the other hand, the violation might be happening *to* us.

Sometimes, it’s on purpose (yikes!), which tells us we may need to employ a safety strategy or get help developing firm clear boundaries for ourselves. 💞

3. More often than not, though, it’s simply someone inadvertently crossing a boundary line…that we’ve never actually communicated with them. 👀

Thankfully, we can learn how to fix that, too. 😅

In all of these potential boundary crossing areas, our anger is usually the first thing that alerts us to the problem…so that we can figure out how to make things better.

Turns out, anger is a wonderful member of our inner boundaries team.

❤️

Molly
Cartooning the boundaries every day. Follow this page for more. 😊

📌📌📌

Sober Spokane 2022! On January 3rd, Wiley's Bistro, Prohibition Gastropub, Lion's Liar, and Wooden City will be supporting those in our community who do not drink alcohol by participating in Sober Spokane. This will also be to support Dry January, which promotes not drinking during the month of January as a reset to your body. Thank you to our partners!

Is your organization interested in our event? Contact our team at [email protected]

NorthEast Support Team-NEST Coalition, Spokane Regional Health District, Recovery Cafe Spokane, Wiley's Bistro, Prohibition Gastropub, Lions Lair, Wooden City

Elephant in the room approaches to depression and other mental health concerns just create deeper problems. Healing requires courageously honest naming and airing of underlying dynamics in a safe and supportive environment.

"First the man takes the drink, then the drink takes the man."
Sculpture created based off an old Irish saying. Sculptor Thomas Lerooy

Kristen Sobkowiak, LMHC, MHP, SUDP updated their information in their About section.

Rent Assistance for Spokane City Residents! - https://mailchi.mp/1ea9fb1bacd5/rent-assistance-for-spokane-city-residents

Are you making deposits?? Let’s help each other learn how!

www.dshs.wa.gov

Online AA Meetings During COVID-19 Online AA Meetings During COVID-19 Online Meetings Directory http://aa-intergroup.org/directory.php Speaker Tape Websites https://www.aaspeaker.com/ https://hacoaa.org/archives/speakers/ https://www.recoveryaudio.org/ Speaker Tape Apps AA Audio Companion Google Play- https://play.google...

Those feelings tho 😁🤪🤨😔🥴😵😳🥺😭😱🤬😈