illuminate_psychology

The last in our series of ways to support your own mental health is to put yourself first. This is difficult for many; we go through life being told to put others first and that it is selfish to put your needs first. However, if we always put other’s needs first, we abandon ourselves, who is looking after our needs?

It is not selfish to see your needs as equally important to those of others, to still be able to give in a measured way, to set boundaries and to learn to tolerate guilt experienced when setting limits. It can be helpful to consider the pitfalls of sacrificing your own needs, we become resentful, burnt out and at times can’t say no to keep ourselves safe. On the flipside, giving yourself permission to meet your own needs can lead to opportunities to build reciprocal relationships with others, exploring your own emotions, noticing people will cope without our sacrifices, keeping ourselves safe and it means we can still have something left to give.

Today can you consider something you can do for yourself, no matter how big or small, it all matters.
✨If you are tired, find a way to rest, if you need to, ask your friend to reschedule plans for next weekend.
✨Spend the afternoon watching your favourite TV show. Resting is not lazy.
✨Consider how you are feeling today and what you need, do you need some quiet time, maybe a yoga class, possibly a catch up with friends.
✨If it feels too much to say ‘no’ to someone, can you start with a compromise, for example ‘I would love to come to the shops with you but I am not available today, I would love to come next Saturday’.

Journaling is number four in our series of ways you can support your mental health. Have you ever noticed after you go to therapy or talk to a friend that you feel a sense of relief. Journaling can have the same benefit, writing down what you are thinking or feeling can help you understand what you are experiencing and look at it from a different perspective.

There are no rules with journaling, you can write about anything that is on your mind or in your heart. You can journal as often or little as you like, you get to do this on your terms in a way that is helpful for you. Sometimes it can be hard to know what to write about, and you may find the journal prompts below helpful:
✨Evening Gratitude: Recall a positive experience from the day that you are grateful for. By noticing the sensory details it can help the memory stick in your brain, so can you note what you were able to see, hear, feel, taste or smell at the time?
✨Find a quote you love and write what it means to you.
✨Describe what you love about your friends or family.
✨What are the things you worry about or something that has been on your mind lately?
✨Write about a favourite memory or a time in your life when you were fully present.

If you are someone who likes to use a guided journal, for adults I recommend ‘Good Morning, I love you’ by Shauna Shapiro, and for kids I recommend the ‘Cup Filling Journal’ by

Hi there!

It has been a little while since we reached out and said hello. Here at Illuminate Psychology Perth we support clients experiencing mental health concerns and focus on working collaboratively with clients to meet their goals and improve their wellbeing.

We hope you find our content helpful but we always encourage you to seek professional support and reiterate that social media can not replace therapy.

These little guys, 'Eggspressions', are used in our therapy to assist in understanding the different parts of us, as well as learning about our emotions.

In our series of ways you can support your mental health, number 3 is self-compassion. Quite often we have the ability to show compassion to others but find it difficult to display the same kindness to ourselves. You are the voice you will hear the most in your life, if the words are unkind, it has a big impact on your mental health.

Compassion to others involves noticing their pain or suffering, responding to that pain, showing warmth, care and wanting to help them in some way. When we experience compassion for others, we notice that people make mistakes, that no one is perfect and we don’t judge them harshly. Self-compassion is treating yourself in the same way, noticing when we are experiencing difficulty and responding with care and comfort in the moment, it is the practice of goodwill.

Three ways you can practice self-compassion today:
✨If you make a mistake, recognise that no one is perfect, that making mistakes of failing at something is inevitable. Rather than responding with harsh words, try being gentle on yourself.
✨Practice mindfulness, notice your thoughts and feelings, these are valid. Can you observe your thoughts non-judgementally and try not to get pulled into the intensity of negative thoughts or feelings.
✨Create a self-compassion phrase that you can use to support yourself in the moment, for example, ‘I am trying my best and that is enough for today’ or ‘May I be kind to myself and remember that we are all human’.

Number two in our series of ways you can support your mental health is to use your senses to assist in emotion regulation. Using any of our senses can be effective in grounding us in the present moment, giving us an opportunity to use our breathe work, notice what is happening and decide how we want to proceed.

There are many ways to use our senses, why don’t you try one of these today:
✨Five senses - Notice five things you can see, four things you can feel, three things you can hear, two things you can smell and one thing you can taste.
✨Use essential oils – Lavender can be very effective for calming, clary sage is helpful when we feel agitated.
✨Look around you, notice five things that are the colour blue, or start with the letter ‘M’.
✨Have a shower, notice the feeling of the water on your skin, pay attention to the scent of your soap.
✨Sit outside, notice the feeling of the sun or wind on your skin, listen to the sounds, notice what you can smell.

The first in our series of five things we can do to support our own mental health. Breathwork.

Breathing impacts the response of our autonomic nervous system; slow, deep breathing will stimulate your vagus nerve.

Breathing is not a passive action. It takes focus, practice and time to master effective breathing.

Try this breathing technique:
✨Breathe in for 4 seconds
✨Hold for 4 seconds
✨Breathe out from your mouth for 6 seconds (tip breathing out for longer is better for initiating our calm reflex)
✨ Hold for 4 seconds
✨ Repeat

Seeking out support

If you haven’t seen a therapist before then making the first step can be daunting. Your worries might be:
💫 You may not be sure what to expect from the session,
💫 You may not know what to talk about,
💫 You might be worried about forgetting parts you want to share, or
💫 You might not be sure what your therapist needs to know.

There is no right or wrong way. As your therapist we aim to try help you feel comfortable and will ask questions, as we are curious to get to know you, but it is always at your own pace.

As time goes on, we will continue to learn more about you, but your first session we will generally discuss your concerns, what has brought you to therapy, your history as well as your goals.

The first session is different to future sessions, in that it is really an opportunity for you and your therapist to get to know each other. It is important that you feel comfortable with your therapist as the therapeutic relationship influences the success of therapy. If you don’t feel like you ‘click’ with your therapist, let them know and we can work together to find a therapist who may be a better fit.

If you would like to learn more, you are welcome to reach out to us for a chat and we can try answer any questions you might have. To get in contact with us you can visit our website, link in bio ✨

Social media reinforces comparison. We look at people’s posts, compare ourselves, our lives, relationships, jobs and so much more. It can lead to this sense of ‘I am not good enough’.

What no one is reminding you is that what people put on social media is a very small part of their life, and I love this illustration by

Remember you are on your own path. No one’s life compares to yours, you are achieving in your own ways and it is important that you are meeting your own needs, not anyone else’s expectations.

As their parent or loved one, you know them better than most. You know when something isn’t right, you feel it in your gut. But maybe you are questioning what you are seeing, or you aren’t sure what is happening when they are at school or work.

What are some things you may need to look out for:
- Weight loss, negative focus on weight, body or shape
- Restricting, skipping meals, avoiding certain foods (carbohydrates, fun foods, sugar etc), becoming vegetarian or vegan
- Changes in mood, irritable, anxious, trouble sleeping, withdrawing, lack of energy
- Spending less time with friends and family, finding it difficult to go out and socialise
- Increase in secretive behaviours around food, hiding food, or finding food is being thrown out
- Anxiety around the preparation of food, or not being in control of what is in the meal
- Stressful meal times, refusal to eat, excuses as to why they don’t want to eat
- Evidence of over eating, large amounts of food disappearing
- Focus on exercise has become excessive, can’t take a break from exercise, has to exercise to have permission to eat
- Frequent trips to the bathroom particularly after meal times

Eating disorders do not all look the same and they are difficult to detect. You may see some of these behaviours, but not all. If you answer yes to some of these points or have concerns we encourage you to make an appointment for your child/loved one with your GP/Dr as a first point of call! They can do the appropriate physical and mental assessments and give you advice on what to do next.

You can also find more information at or Inside Out Institute

Society sets the expectation that eating disorders look a certain way.

Do you think you can tell if someone has an eating disorder? You can’t.

Myth: Eating disorders only affect certain groups within the population.
Truth: Eating disorders can affect anyone. Any age, gender, race, ethnicity, socioeconomic status, sexual orientation and body weight or shape.

Myth: An eating disorder requires someone to be underweight.
Truth: Less than 6% of individuals with an eating disorder are medically underweight.

Myth: Eating disorders are Anorexia Nervosa or Bulimia Nervosa.
Truth: These may be the eating disorders more people are aware of, however there are many more diagnosable eating disorders - Binge Eating Disorder (BED), Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID), PICA, Other specified eating and feeding disorders (OSFED), Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD), as well as Orthorexia (not currently in the DSM5) and disordered eating.

Over a million people in Australia are currently experiencing an eating disorder, however only around one quarter are seeking support. Eating disorders are not a choice, they are a serious biopsychosocial mental illness.

You can recover from an eating disorder and you deserve to live a meaningful life.

We hold hope for your recovery 💜✨

Image credit:

Asking for help can be daunting. We feel we need it, but we don’t always know where to turn. Reach out to family, friends or professionals.

Well done for being brave.

Have a beautiful Friday ❤️

Image:
Book - The boy, the mole, the fox and the horse. If you haven’t read it, do yourself a favour and grab a copy xx

What we do!

At Illuminate Psychology Perth we have particular experience working with eating disorders, body image concerns, body dysmorphia, anxiety, depression, OCD, trauma and personality disorders. We utilise evidence based best practice and aim to provide a space that is caring and compassionate, where we can work collaboratively with you to understand your current difficulties and enhance your wellbeing.

You can visit our website to get in contact with us, link in bio.

Welcome!

Illuminate Psychology Perth provides psychological healthcare to adults and adolescents struggling with eating disorders and other mental health concerns.

We are based in East Perth and Greenwood. You can visit our website to get in contact with us, link in bio.