Therapy Institute

I will be delivering a talk about navigating family dynamics, relationships and parenting in Portumna Town Hall this Saturday, the 14th of September at 3pm. For tickets, visit shorelinesartsfestival.com. Look forward to seeing you there.

➡️Last Friday I naively undertook the Tom Crean Challenge down in Kerry. I was asked by Alan O’Sullivan from CyberSafeKids would I be willing to take part in this event to raise money for the charity. 

➡️Tom Crean was no slouch. When I read the itinerary, I knew I had bitten off more than I usually like to chew. We had to travel 150k in 24 hours without sleep.

➡️The chats with strangers through the darkness of night, and seeing Kerry in all of its splendour as the sun rose over the Kingdom was magnificent. 

➡️But when someone explained to me how this event started, it inspired me to keep going. Kieran O’Callaghan lost his wife, Fiona to cancer in 2011. He was left to raise his four children, and decided to honour his wife’s life by undertaking the Peninsula Challenge. For years he undertook it on his own, until it started to grow. He has now raised over €225,000.

➡️You can access the full article through my link tree.

➡️The CAO first round offers came out yesterday, and for many that brought incredible joy as they have been offered a place in college. However, for some, it meant bitter disappointment and confusion as they missed out on the college place they had their hearts set on. 

➡️Well, the first thing to do is to realise there are more offers to come. Many students don’t take up the offer they were given and therefore places come back online again. 

➡️Our movement through life isn’t in a straight line, it is more like what Carl Jung said, it’s the circumambulation of the self, an oscillating circle that moves up and back and up and back. At times we feel we are going backwards or standing still but that is not true. When I think of my own life, there were many moments I didn’t get what I was after. I felt like I had failed somehow. I didn’t hit what I was aiming for. But as I look at it now, many years from those moments I can clearly see all the bounty that came into my life.

➡️True intelligence is found when our passion meets our focus, then you start to see what you are capable of. Whatever the outcome yesterday, remember you are far more than those results or seats in college.

➡️You can access the full article through my link tree.

Tune in to at 10:30am this morning where I’ll be talking about how to support your anxious child going back to school.

Tune into the Pat Kenny Show on at 9.30am today. I’ll be on to discuss all things leaving certificate and Minister Foley’s proposed smart phone ban.

➡️The longest relationships you have are with your siblings. But they can be some of the trickiest relationships. So many factors are at play: Where you come in the family, how your parents managed the dynamic between their children, and your siblings’ life partners.

➡️Jealousy is often present, and can cause a lifetime of conflict and hurt.

➡️There is a deep insecurity underlining jealously that causes a crack in someone’s foundation. That rupture can form very early in someone’s development.

➡️If we stopped viewing them through the lens of what they have, and how they had it easy in life, or how they always know everything, perhaps we might see them as they truly are: Messy and insecure like the rest of us.

➡️You can access the full article through my link tree.

Had a great day filming season 3 of Raised by the village. Rostellan Farm was just fabulous. The food was out of this world! Teagan had a special time. So proud to be involved in this show. Thank you Joe and Olivia of

My latest book ‘Home is Where the Start is’ is available in all good vending machines, apparently!! Very funny to see this!

➡️The summer of 1992 was golden. I spent two weeks of it in Castlegregory, in Co Kerry, hanging around the shops, playing music in the little pool room around the back, and running free on the wild beaches with friends I had just made. 

➡️it was a magical time. It was even more special because I had a crush on one of the girls.

➡️When I returned to my house in Douglas, Cork, in the autumn of ’92, the girl I had just met in Castlegregory wrote a letter.

➡️Last week, as my daughter Lizzy was sitting watching television, the postman dropped a few letters through the door. There was a letter for Lizzy Hogan. 

➡️She ran into the kitchen and opened it. She read it with a huge smile on her face. I don’t think Santa has brought as big a smile as that letter did with all his fancy presents.

➡️Getting children to write letters is a wonderful gift. They learn to articulate themselves through words, while also learning that someone values them enough to take the time to write a letter and post it.

➡️You can access the full article through my link tree.

I am delighted to announce an upcoming event, “Thriving After Childhood”. I will be cohosting the event with renowned Psychologist and author of the best-selling memoir “Poor” Dr Katriona O’Sullivan - with special guest Niall Breslin.

This highly anticipated workshop aims to empower individuals to explore their family history and to understand the impact of family and trauma on human development .

With my expertise in Family Systems attendees will map their own family tree; they will be given some tools to recognise negative patterns from childhood- helping to avoid them when it comes to their own family.

With Katriona’s expertise in the neurobiology of trauma and her inspirational story; attendees will embark on a journey of self-discovery and growth. Katriona will delve into the intricate dynamics of healing within the context of trauma resilience. The session will offer an exploration of the neural mechanisms of trauma and the strategies that contribute to restoring harmony in the aftermath of trauma.

“Thriving After Childhood” is designed to provide participants with the tools and mindset necessary to overcome obstacles, break through historical family patterns, and create a life of fulfilment and purpose.

You can book tickets through my link tree (linked in my bio). Tickets are selling quickly - don’t miss out!

You can also copy and paste this link to book tickets: https://thrive_child.eventbrite.com

➡️There are so many influencers out there telling parents how to be the perfect parent. It seems like you need a psychology degree and masters in family therapy to successfully manage it all.

➡️A recent phenomenon that has spread among parents is that of competitive parenting.

➡️You can see it at parties, a child joylessly unwrapping gift after gift. That type of experience metastasizes and envelopes perception, nothing brings joy because nothing is good enough.

➡️Children don’t need the biggest party or the latest expensive phone. They will remember how you were with them, the connection you had, the love you shared not the size of the gift you gave them.

➡️You can access the full article through my link tree.

Tune into at 9:45am this morning where I will be chatting about competitive parenting. Saying ‘No’ is such an important part of parenting and our children don’t need the best of everything!! They will remember the feelings, the live, the connection they had, not the latest iPhone!

➡️Life is change. You are never one thing for too long.

➡️Our bodies change, our relationships change, even our relationship with ourselves changes. So we should be able to manage life transitions, because all we really have is change.

➡️In three weeks, many students across the country will enter into secondary school. That is one of the biggest changes they will go through in their young life.

➡️But also when they have managed a change like this, they will feel powerful. They will know they have the capacity to change, and that is such an important life lesson for children.

➡️You can access the full article through my link tree.

➡️This time last year, the Mental Health Commission (MHC) published a damning report on the provision of services to vulnerable children and families in Ireland.

➡️I don’t believe that our government doesn’t care about children. I believe they do. This question about how we care for children and families in crisis is complicated, but I believe we can solve it.

➡️The MHC outlined 49 recommendations in its report last year. The question we should be asking, as tax payers, parents, clinicians, teachers and as a society, is: Why have those recommendations not been implemented? The MHC were clear that there is a solution, yet nothing has happened.

➡️Once again, like last year, when I wrote about the MHC report on Camhs, I am optimistic we can bring the change required to help families and children in distress.

➡️You can access the article through my link tree.

➡️Play was such a huge part of my childhood. I loved all games. I still do. I remember the tennis played on a beach in Normandy, in France. We had to come up with a rhyme for our tennis persona: ‘My name is Björn Borg, and I put my opponents in the morgue’. The court was etched into the hard, damp sand.

➡️As I aged, I missed play. Adult life and all it demands got in the way. But when I had children, I was excited to be allowed back in to that world of play. In every little activity, there was a game: Brushing teeth, eating dinner, even going up the stairs.

➡️As a psychotherapist, I have always known the importance of play for a child’s healthy development.

➡️They learn about themselves and how they are with others. Play is crucial in those early years, but also crucial in the adult years. We so easily forget this fact.

➡️Play is not just for children, it is something we should all be doing throughout our journey in life.

➡️You can access the full article through my link tree.

Tune in at 9:30an where I’ll be discussing how play is an important part of our wellbeing. have recently released research that shows the benefit of adults playing. It improves cognitive functioning and relieves stress! So don’t for get to play this week!

Click the link in my link tree, to listen to the podcast I recorded on the ‘Growing Pains’ podcast. I discuss setting boundaries and how to navigate being a grandparent.

➡️Ireland has recently experienced the latest pop sensation to sweep this planet: Taylor Swift.

➡️Unfortunately, I wasn’t in the country to go with my daughters. But I stayed up to Facetime them while they were at the concert, and I was immediately taken by the vibe I witnessed down the phone. 

➡️The utter joy of my 10-year-old Swiftie, excitedly telling me how people loved all the friendship bracelets she had made and how some people even exchanged bracelets with her. 

➡️I think Taylor Swift allows her fans to feel connected to her in a way that has rarely been achieved by other artists. They feel empowered by her and her message.

➡️You can access the full article through my link tree.

Another year over visiting and being with the wonderful friends of the Badjao Tribe. We always learn so much more than we teach. Salamat Kaayo!

➡️Whenever I hear church bells carrying down the avenue in Seabury, Malahide, I stop and listen. There is something in them that halts me in my tracks.

➡️I want my children to understand that God is love. And loves all of us, not just some. They should be proud of who they are, while also endeavouring to be better. The recent comments by the Pope about homosexuality once again left me feeling further from the Church than ever. 

➡️The Church is facing a serious problem. The world has changed irrevocably from the days when it had hordes of followers. If the Church could modernise, and be a more hopeful and positive experience for all of the community, I think we would see a massive resurgence in faith and participation.

➡️You can read the full article through my link tree.

Volunteers working with Embrace Badjao in Davao Philippines had an incredible morning meeting the beautiful children and families of The Badjao tribe. Doing what’s meaningful and not profitable in this world brings true joy!! I felt it this morning, singing and dancing and just being together. Magic.

I’ll be on Newstalk tomorrow morning at 7:30am talking about the implications of the surgeon general’s recommendation to place warning labels on social media.

➡️I meet so many families this time of year struggling with all the pressures the exams place on them. They describe living with an easily-agitated diva. But the good news is it shall all be over soon.

➡️At this time of year, when they are burnt-out and stressed, sleep is more important than ever. But it is imperative that you don’t keep telling them this. The more we want sleep, the less sleep we get.

➡️Most teenagers need help with their devices. The brain needs time to recover from the intensity of the exams; endlessly scrolling devices does not allow the brain to recover.

➡️Irish streets are always drenched in brilliant sunshine for those two/three weeks. But soon the nondescript gunmetal grey days shall return and our young adults will head off into the next phase of their wonderful lives. Parents, hang in there for the ‘Thank you’, it’s coming. I swear.

➡️You can read the full article through the link in my link tree.

Tune in at 10:45am this morning where I’ll be talking all things summer jobs! It gives children value in money while also building their resilience.

➡️I have been advocating for years for strong legislation to protect our children while they are online. I have watched, flabbergasted, while children’s rights are denied in the online world.

➡️Last month, I was invited to meet both Coimisiún na Meán and Minister for Education Norma Foley, to discuss the impact technology is having on the lives of our children and how we can better protect them. 

➡️We need robust legislation to protect children and to end the era of self-regulation of ‘big tech’. That seems like a no-brainer to me.

➡️The new online digital-media code, which was released last week, signals the end of that era and the beginning of a new one.

➡️However, the code does not go far enough, because it is not prescriptive in its threshold for taking down material. And while it remains vague these companies can act at their own pace. This is not good enough.

➡️Technology is here to stay. We need a systemic shift.

➡️You can access the full article through my link tree.

I met with Minister for education Norma Foley yesterday. We discussed the impact smartphones and devices have on a child’s development. I will be discussing the meeting on today at 4:30pm. Tune in!!

➡️If you’re like me and you have a teenager rattling around the house, you are probably wondering what to do with them for the summer.

➡️If you are worried that your teenager will not be active and just be on their device, I would suggest thinking about getting them a job.

➡️We have to give them memories of being competent and useful, being valued by their community, and having something valuable to offer. Now, that is the root of real resilience.

➡️Getting your teenager out and working a job this summer might just be the tonic that the whole family needs.

➡️You can access the full article through my link tree.

➡️I work with teenagers every day, I even live with one. I know phones are such a significant part of how teenagers communicate with each other.

➡️Since the pandemic, when we told children to stay home from school and use technology to communicate, I have seen a significant rise in the level of issues with technology and the family. 

➡️Parents must not close their eyes and hope it all goes okay. Currently we are witnessing the biggest experiment on childhood, playing out in front of our eyes.

➡️When we look back, what will we want to say — ‘My god, why were we so passive?’ Or ‘we did everything we could to protect our children while also allowing them to enjoy technology’?

➡️You can access the full article through my link tree.

Very proud Dad. I finally might have a Cork hurler! Although she does shout ‘up the Dubs’.

➡️Many of the people I work with come to therapy because they are stuck. They have been thinking a certain way, for many years and now feel like they have reached a dead-end with the way they view things.

➡️They live with the logic, to go for something opens them up to pain and rejection. Of course, the reality is their logic is ensuring that they live with pain and rejection constantly because they are rejecting themselves all the time. 

➡️We should push our children to have the courage to go for things, and teach them that not getting something isn’t failure but a part of a healthy life journey.

➡️Reaching for something and not getting it isn’t failure. It’s thriving. You go again.

➡️You can access the article through my link tree.