The Crab Cram

Hope your hungry 🤤 🙌🙌🙌

Amazing! We received the award of excellence from restaurant guru!! Thank you Andrew !

Come see us this weekend for a chance to get paid to eat! We will be offering half off Schrimps* at our food truck, which will be catering this epic event! The Crumb Stars will be there! Getting paid to eat AND the Crumb Stars?? Whats not to like?!

*Consuming our "Schrimps" (not to be confused with "shrimps") poses health risks that are much greater in scope and involves a larger threat of illness than consuming "regular" shrimp. "Schrimps" are not "shrimps" but instead are a proprietary dish trademarked by Crab Cram and Crab Cram affiliated businesses. Please be aware of this distinction before ordering and consuming "Schrimps" from The Crab Cram. Thanks!

We have been planning this same thing for a long time - if anyone knows how to do this let us know! People have been coming just for this and it's not what our resterant is about.

ants are gone

Today’s special

All employees spend three weeks at Cramming School

Announcement: Next Tuesday, October 4th, our establishment will be open ONLY as a bathroom. Do not come and expect food. Only our restrooms will be available to the public.

Introducing our new Browned Shrimp Sandwich !!

We will be closed for the next week - our head chef has explosive diarrhea that is MUCH worse than his usual bouts. We are not taking any chances this time!

Due to popular demand we are removing our toilet cams!

Come in at midnight tonight to receive "Crab Guy's Surprise Initiation." Participants will enter an extremely dark room and be beaten ceremoniously with large dead fish. Next, they will be force fed their exact body weight in rotten shrimp. Finally to finish off the ritual, participants will be dragged up to the roof and dropped off into a large vat containing a thick sludge of yesterday's sea cream. Anyone who signs up and survives gets free Crab cakes for a week!

Our second location is opening up! This one does NOT have ruptured septic tanks. We converted this old tire store into a seafood cafeteria! The left over oil on the floor allows our customers to slide through our restaurant quicker than ever!

Under new FDA "guidelines" on the health and safety of consuming potentially harmful substances, our food is technically considered poison. Let me just say - that is ridiculous and reflective of the continued growth of big government bureaucracy.** First they try to take our guns away and now our beloved sea meat?! These are troubling times my friends.

**women who are pregnant or planning on becoming pregnant should NOT eat at The Crab Cram.