Rachel A. Foreman, LCSW

‘She sat at the back and they said she was shy,
She led from the front and they hated her pride,
They asked her advice and then questioned her guidance,
They branded her loud, then were shocked by her silence,
When she shared no ambition they said it was sad,
So she told them her dreams and they said she was mad,
They told her they'd listen, then covered their ears,
And gave her a hug while they laughed at her fears,
And she listened to all of it thinking she should,
Be the girl they told her to be best as she could,
But one day she asked what was best for herself,
Instead of trying to please everyone else,
So she walked to the forest and stood with the trees,
She heard the wind whisper and dance with the leaves,
She spoke to the willow, the elm and the pine,
And she told them what she'd been told time after time,
She told them she felt she was never enough,
She was either too little or far far too much,
Too loud or too quiet, too fierce or too weak,
Too wise or too foolish, too bold or too meek,
Then she found a small clearing surrounded by firs,
And she stopped...and she heard what the trees said to her,
And she sat there for hours not wanting to leave,
For the forest said nothing, it just let her breathe.'
(Author: Helmsley) and photo: Howarth Photography

Amazing parenting advice!

Why Decluttering Can Lead to Increased Brain Power ... along with a feeling of lightness and greater positivity.

How Grief Can Change the Brain The lessons are hard, but the class can't be avoided.

Think you understand rapid cycling with bipolar disorder? You probably don't . . . (Listen on your fave player)

Why Every Marriage Is Really 3 Relationships ... and why being lovers isn't the steadiest of the three.

This just happened in my eye doctor’s parking lot. 😕. At least it’s Friday.

I love this because I experienced it. My mother had mental illness and was unstable and unpredictable. Life at home was usually chaotic. My father, on the other hand, was my constant. No matter what else was happening at home, I always knew what I would get from him. That simple smile somehow made me feel safe and valued. Don’t underestimate these small interactions with your kids.

OLD DRESSER TURNED DOLLHOUSE - such a great upcycling project!
https://www.marthastewart.com/7838910/how-upcycle-dresser-into-dollhouse

When My Father Died, I Discovered the Unmentionable Stage of Mourning: Relief I was troubled by this feeling. But it’s more common than you think.

Always be kind 💚💚

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/parenting/wp/2016/02/10/i-have-to-learn-to-care-for-my-suicidal-teen-with-limits-but-without-fear/?fbclid=IwAR3Mb1gf2vgvb6jR7eI36hD_D38Q7a1TcAHKjyTQgWEDGjv2A3cK98mwxXU

I have to learn to care for my suicidal teen with limits but without fear My son has died a thousand times in my mind. I wonder sometimes whether it will always be that way, and whether I will ever relax again. And at the same time, I have to hold boundaries and be a parent.

In order to prevent spread of germs among my clients, I have decided to close my office for the week. I am hoping that anyone who was exposed over the holidays will either realize it or no longer be contagious by the beginning of next week. I do have several immune compromised clients who cannot get vaccinated and I feel this is the safest course of action at this time. I will be offering telephone sessions to all scheduled clients this week. We plan to reopen the office on January 10th. If you have any questions, please call our appointment line at 337-806-7440.

Everywhere we look this time of year, we see ads and pleas reminding us of the dangers of drinking and driving. While I think it is a valid message, I believe it is naive in a way. Some people are so blinded by their addictions that they can’t or won’t ask for help. Others feel they can ‘just be careful’. Some just don’t give a damn. I think we have to go a step further.
I often see posts on social media where people announce to their friends where the sobriety check points are on days when celebrations are occurring. I guess they believe that by allowing their friends to avoid a DUI, they are doing them a favor. Let me explain, from experience, why that is so far from the truth.
When I was 16, one of my older brothers took a client out to lunch, where they had a few drinks, as he had done many times before. He didn’t think he was impaired. He fell asleep driving home and hit the lady in front of him. She died. I often wonder how different things could have been if, at some point in his life, he would have been pulled over and given a sobriety test. Maybe he would have been scared into changing his behavior. Maybe he would have gotten a DUI and had to pay hefty fines. He could have lost his license for a while. Maybe even done 30 days in jail. But, let me assure you, any of these would be better than what actually occurred.
He has to live with the fact that he killed an innocent young woman. Two little girls grew up without a mother. He lost his career and ultimately his marriage while he sat in a prison cell for six years. My parents had to live with the sadness of watching their child suffer and the shame of their whole community knowing what he did. I spent decades wanting to reach out to those girls, who weren’t much younger than me, to apologize on behalf of our family but always afraid that they would not want to hear anything from us, which I couldn’t blame them for. The ripples that spread from this go on and on. If only something could have stopped it sooner - prevented it.
That’s what sobriety check points are for. Please think about that before you announce where they are. Maybe a ticket or a DUI will be what saves your friend from something much worse. Take it from me.

As a child and adolescent therapist, I cringe when I see children in restaurants watching TV on their parents’ phones. Babies in grocery baskets are often engaged by I-pads instead of the sights and sounds around them. Teens in cars so rarely look out the windows while riding that they are afraid to drive because they don’t know how to get around in their own towns. We are stunting an entire generation. By not allowing our kids to experience the slightest period of boredom, we deny them the chance to learn to self-soothe or to discover their own imagination. If my childhood best friend and I were inside playing video games, we never would have hollowed out the big bush in our backyard to make a clubhouse. We never would have dug up my parents’ garden with spoons looking for buried treasures. How sad that would be, because those are my favorite memories of my childhood.
“I find myself worrying most that when we hand our children phones, we steal their boredom from them. As a result, we are raising a generation of writers who will never start writing, artists who will never start doodling, young chefs who will never make a mess in their kitchen, athletes who will never kick a ball against the wall, musicians who will never pick up their dad’s guitar and start strumming.” (Glennon Doyle)
Instead, we will create another generation of socially stunted young adults who are depressed, physically unhealthy and lacking motivation, imagination, and social skills.
Electronics serve a purpose, but are being abused by parents and children alike. Please do your kids a favor and teach them to live in the moment. Sometimes, turn the electronics off.