Its My Grief Community

7th of June Anne Wilson

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I’m leaving you here. For one night I want to forget. And maybe smile.
Grief: You can’t leave me behind.
I’m tired. You are heavy. Sometimes you are just too much to bear.
Grief: I am a part of you now.
I can shut the door. Forget you for a few hours.
Grief. That is not how this works. I will always catch up to you.
Why are you doing this to me? It’s not fair. You are much too dark to take everywhere I go.
Grief: Maybe we need another way to think about this.
How would there be any other way?
Grief: Well..for starters, I am only here because of love.
No. You are here because my loved one died.
Grief: But you still feel love.
Always.
Grief: You just renamed me. That is why I am here. I am Love always. You can’t just leave me. I’m a part of you.
But it hurts so much. No more phone calls. Hugs... Plans. Empty chairs. Holidays… I can’t take this pain.
Grief. Running from me only makes it harder for you. Sit with me. I am only the love you still have to give. So feel it. Give some of it to yourself. Carry me with you. Picture me as only love and light.
So why have I been so afraid of you?
Grief. Because reality is hard to accept. This is the hardest thing to do. It takes time to get used to me. But I am here to help you remember.
I just want to be over this.
Grief: The pain you feel when a memory crosses your mind will someday make you smile. It’s because the longer you carry me with you…the wonderful memories will stay with you too.
So instead of carrying grief…I can think of it as carrying my love?
Grief: light a candle within me. Love isn’t dark. I’m only light. I remain because all your love your person still remains in you. I am love you wish to still give. I cannot be left behind. I carry on with you until the day you reunite.
So hold that light in your hand. And carry that love with you. To the very last of days.

Posted by Rhonda Coffey

From the moment we learned what happened and still now, I’ve felt like I’ve been living in this strange alternate universe.

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I stood by your bed last night; I came to have a peep.
I could see that you were crying; you found it hard to sleep.
I spoke to you softly as you brushed away a tear,
"It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."
I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour the tea,
You were thinking of the many things and memories of me.
I was with you at the shops today; your arms were getting sore.
I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more.
I was with you at my grave today; you tend it with such care.
I want to re-assure you, that I'm not lying there.
I walked with you towards the house, as you fumbled for your key.
I gently put my hand on you; I smiled and said, "it's me."
You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair.
I tried so hard to let you know, that I was standing there.
It's possible for me, to be so near you everyday.
To say to you with certainty, "I never went away."
You sat there very quietly, then smiled, I think you knew...
in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.
The day is over... I smile and watch you yawning
and say "good-night, God bless, I'll see you in the morning."
And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,
I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand, side by side.
I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.
Be patient, live your journey out...then come home to me.

Author Colleen Fitzsimmons

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Grieving Fully Living Fully - When a Child Dies When a child dies, our whole world changes. In this 5-week course with David Kessler, we'll explore this unique grief and help create a path forward to remember with more love than pain.

https://www.ted.com/talks/nora_mcinerny_we_don_t_move_on_from_grief_we_move_forward_with_it?fbclid=IwAR1YMAvuQ83hSCEIDqXHUfQrJrsue0s0qXwR1kCILweJC4FqOMIRaGN8Rw8

We don't "move on" from grief. We move forward with it In a talk that's by turns heartbreaking and hilarious, writer and podcaster Nora McInerny shares her hard-earned wisdom about life and death. Her candid approach to something that will, let's face it, affect us all, is as liberating as it is gut-wrenching. Most powerfully, she encourages us to shift...

Gods promise. No more pain, suffering, or grief that steals the very soul of man.

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This can be confusing in grief, especially early on when we just desperately need to tell our story. In time we learn not every situation and not every person is going to be able to treat our grief with the respect and attention it deserves. Thoughts?

https://www.facebook.com/100044192781453/posts/838815710934847/?mibextid=Nif5oz

Vulnerable conversation with TobyMac about grief and loss. What does it feel like to lose someone close to you? TobyMac shares his experience in this vulnerable video.If you are dealing with grief or loss, there is h...

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— YOU’RE THE GHOST —
There’s a part of the grieving process,
where your soul kind of leaves your body too.
As though it’s off searching for the one you lost,
somewhere in the ether.

You walk around,
doing all the right things,
putting one foot in front of the other,
living,
but it’s really as though you’re the ghost.

Perhaps you are.

Perhaps your soul searches,
until you find the one you miss,
and they tell you to go back and live.

So, when that numbness passes brave one,
maybe it’s time to do what you are told,
go back and live,
twice as hard.

You don’t belong there in the ether,
nor do you need to search for the one you lost,
they find you.
And when they do,

you’ll feel it.

Written by Donna Ashworth 💕

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BEING A MOTHER WHO HAS LOST A CHILD

There’s an order that life is supposed to follow.

An order of breaths we are supposed to take,
as if we are passing a torch from one generation to the next.

And our torch is supposed to go out before our child’s flame is extinguished.

We are supposed to watch them take their first breath.
But not their last.

We are supposed to hear the thud-thud of their heart when it starts beating.
But never the silence when it stops.

That heart that we once carried inside of us. That breath that we gave them. That life that we kept safe, protected.

So when the order of life is disrupted,
when their torch goes out before yours,
it is as if you too have been robbed of your breath
and as if your heart has stopped beating as well.

There is nothing that can make it less painful.
You would happily blow out your flame if it meant theirs could burn.

But you can’t. Even though that’s how it should be.

So all you can do is carry them inside you -
like you did once before.
Except now they have to stay in your heart forever.

And though it hurts,
just know that they are safe there.
They are protected.

Because a mother’s love is unending.
Because it burns forever with every breath you take and
with every beat your heart makes.

Because a mother’s love
is a flame that can
never
be extinguished.

This is Bilie Arthur. My 53 year old cousin who we lost last year. She had cancer and died within 2 months of finding that out. I didn't get to say goodbye to her either. Broke my heart.

My dad. Lost him suddenly Mar 6 2010 to alcoholism. One of the worst days of my life. I miss him so much!

This is Kaligirl. She was 17 when I lost her. I had her for 15 years. She was my baby. I miss her like I would my child.

Whether you have suffered loss of a friend, family member, pet, marriage, or even someone still living, you are welcome here.

You are NOT alone.

Welcome to your place to share your grief, loss, find love & support, and understand how to grow around the grief instead of it destroying you.