Meggie Zanger, LPCC

🌷I see you. You are NOT alone. You are DOING enough, and you ARE enough.

🌷On this Mother’s Day (and every day for that matter) may you do something just for YOU.

PS - While many of these experiences are normal, there are many resources out there to help! Please reach out for support. In addition to the therapy services I offer, I can connect you to pelvic floor therapists, lactation consultants, support groups, fitness classes for moms, postpartum doulas, chiropractors, acupuncturists, and more!

🌸Mother’s Day is a complex and emotional holiday for many women. It can bring up a range of emotions and experiences, and it’s important to acknowledge and honor the diversity of these experiences.

💐For some, it can bring feelings of joy and celebration as they are surrounded by loved ones and honored for their role as a mother or showing love to their own mothers. For others, Mother’s Day can be a painful reminder of who they are missing. And for some it can be both. Two things can be true.

🌷On this Mother’s Day weekend, let’s strive to create a space where all women feel seen and valued, regardless of their relationship with motherhood. Whether it’s a day of joy and celebration or a day of grief and reflection, let’s take the time to listen and support each other. 💕🫶🏼

Today, on Termination for Medical Reasons (TFMR) Awareness Day, I want to shed light on this specific form of disenfranchised grief. A TFMR is when a pregnancy is ended due to the health of the unborn baby or that of the mother/birthing person.

It’s a deeply personal and complex journey that can bring profound sorrow and that many struggle to understand. TFMR may not always be openly acknowledged or validated by society, which can compound the pain and isolation.

If you or someone you know is grappling with TFMR-related grief, know that I see you and you are not alone. Your feelings, whether it be grief, guilt, fear, sadness, confusion, anger, relief, or a mixture of them all, are valid.

Let’s honor and support those affected by TFMR, and work towards fostering greater empathy and understanding for all forms of pregnancy loss and grief. 💙

Today is World Maternal Mental Health Day.

🤰1 in 5 women are impacted by a perinatal mental health disorder every year, and it's the # 1 complication of pregnancy and labor and delivery.

👩‍🍼Today, this week, and the rest of this month is all about spreading awareness about the mental health challenges that new moms face in pregnancy and postpartum.

🤱Motherhood is both beautiful and messy at the same time. As a therapist certified in perinatal mental health, I understand that the path to starting or growing a family looks different for everyone. I meet you where you are and provide a compassionate, safe space in which I walk alongside you on your journey.

🫶You're not broken. You're not alone. I’d be happy to talk with you about how I can be of support.

Let’s Connect:
https://meggiezanger.com/

Postpartum Support International is another comprehensive resource for educational information, finding providers near you, crisis support, and connecting with support groups:

🔷 Call or text the PSI HelpLine at 800-944-4773. You never need a diagnosis to ask for help.
🔷 Call or text the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline (US) at 1-833-852-6262
🔷 In a crisis situation, call or text the National Su***de & Crisis Lifeline at 988
🔷 Visit postpartum.net for additional programs and resources.

In recognition of National Infertility Awareness Week, I'd like to share a few tips to help prioritize mental health as you navigate your reproductive journey:

🍍Educate Yourself: Learn about the fertility treatment process, including the various procedures and potential outcomes. Understanding what to expect can help alleviate anxiety and give you a sense of agency.

🍍Connect with Others: Although it may feel like it sometimes, you're not alone. Connect with those who are going through similar experiences. Join support groups where you can ask questions and share your feelings with people who understand.

🍍Practice Self-Care: Prioritize activities that help you relax, reduce stress, and bring you joy. Engage in safe exercise, get enough sleep, eat a balanced diet, and consider stress reduction techniques like meditation or breath work.

🍍Communicate with Your Partner: Open and honest communication about your thoughts and feelings can strengthen your relationship. Consider couples counseling as a way for you both to get support on this journey.

🍍Set Boundaries: Establish clear boundaries with friends and family regarding conversations and inquiries about your fertility treatment and events you will or will not attend. It's ok to let them know what you're comfortable discussing and what you'd prefer to keep private. If attending events such as baby showers is too painful, you don't have to go.

🍍Seek Professional Support: It can also be helpful to have a safe space to process what you are going through. As a therapist with a Perinatal Mental Health Certification (PMH-C), I can provide guidance, coping strategies, and emotional support throughout your fertility journey. Reach out today via DM or my website for a free chat.

Remember, everyone's fertility journey is unique, and it's essential to prioritize your mental health. Be patient with yourself, practice self-compassion, and don't hesitate to seek help when needed.

When facing infertility or loss, it's common to blame ourselves or feel inadequate. We might compare our journey to others who seemingly have it easier. (I know I have🙋‍♀️).

During National Infertility Awareness week, remind yourself that you're not broken, and you're not to blame. Rather, you're strong, brave, and never alone. 💪🫶

Reach out to your support system, share your story. Connecting with others lessens the isolation.💞 Whether it's family, friends, support groups, mental health therapists, or fertility medical providers, finding your support network empowers you to navigate this journey one step at a time. 🌈

If you need resources, I'm here to help. DM me or comment RESOURCES below.

🤱Bringing a new life into this world is a miraculous experience, but it can also bring unforeseen changes to your relationship dynamics. 🙇

It’s not uncommon for couples to experience stress, communication, issues, and a change in emotional and physical intimacy during this time. 💔❤️‍🩹

✨But here’s the good news – you’re not alone, and there’s a way through it!💖💞

I believe that with the right support, couples cannot only adjust, but also THRIVE in their relationships after baby. Whether you’re struggling with communication, intimacy, or just finding your new normal as parents, I’m here to support and guide you as you through new parenthood, while maintaining a healthy, loving relationship post-baby.👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨

📲For more information or to schedule a free 15 minute consultation call, please feel free to DM me or connect via my website:

💻www.meggiezanger.com

I was so happy to have the opportunity to connect with some new moms and their ADORABLE 🥰 babies this morning after their Stroller Barre class with !

We got to talk about the importance of taking care of our mental health as moms and how to get the support that we deserve.

Kudos to these mamas who prioritized their maternal wellness by getting out and breaking a sweat this morning 💪🏼🙌🏼🌟

“I should be grateful because others have it worse.”

We’ve all said this. We think it will help us feel better…but usually we just end up feeling GUILTY in addition to being sad, stressed, or anxious.

We minimize our pain points by saying:

😒“At least I have a child. I shouldn’t complain because others are struggling with infertility.”

😒“I don’t have a right to be stressed because I have a supportive spouse and family that helps out with the baby.”

😒“At least I can afford IVF, others don’t even get this as an option.”

BUT TWO THINGS CAN BE TRUE:
Other people are dealing with difficult challenges around parenthood, infertility, or loss AND you are struggling with something too.

💓Everyone has their challenges and there is enough compassion in the world to support us all. 💓

❄️The holiday season is upon us, and for all you soon-to-be mamas out there, navigating gatherings and festivities while pregnant can feel anxiety-provoking and exhausting.

❄️It's ok to prioritize your well-being and set boundaries that allow you to enjoy the magic of the season without feeling overwhelmed. These are a few tips to help you find that balance.

❄️Remember, mama, your well-being is paramount! Wishing you a peaceful and joy-filled holiday season!

Dear warriors, 💔🌈 The holiday season can bring a mix of emotions, especially for those bravely facing infertility or reproductive loss. If you find yourself on this journey, please know that your feelings are valid, and setting boundaries is an act of self-love. Here are some gentle reminders for this season:

✨1. Be gentle with yourself
It's okay to acknowledge the pain and give yourself permission to grieve. Embrace self-compassion and remember that healing is a journey, not a destination.

✨2. Communicate your needs
Let your loved ones know how they can support you. Maybe it's minimizing conversation about babies or pregnancy or being understanding if you need to step out during certain triggering events.

✨3. Create a Safe Space
Designate a sanctuary where you can retreat if the festivities become overwhelming. Whether it's a quiet room or a comfy corner, this space can provide solace when needed.

✨4. It’s ok to RSVP ‘No.”
Don’t be afraid to say ‘No’ to certain engagements if they are causing stress or too emotionally taxing. Everyone may not understand, but you still get to choose what is best for you during this time.

🎄Are you starting to realize that you won't get to every item on your holiday to-do list this year? That's OK! Let's rewrite the holiday rulebook.

✨Being a good mom isn't about perfect decorations, holiday cards, or flawless dinners—it's about love, laughter, and the joy of simply being together.

💖Here's to celebrating the messy, imperfect, and beautiful moments that make you the best mom that you are!

📣I’m excited to announce that I will be expanding my business to include in-person therapy starting this December!

📣I’m thrilled to be joining Janelle Provost and Silicon Valley Midwives as we collectively work to provide wholistic wellness to the perinatal population of San Jose, CA!

📣Office Address: 1101 S Wi******er Blvd. San Jose, CA 95128

📣I will still be offering telehealth services, as it continues to be an effective and very much needed platform for mental health, especially for those who are pregnant or new parents. But for those of you who’ve been itching to get back to in-person therapy, I’m here for you too!

📣Reach out today via my website www.meggiezanger.com or DM me to get scheduled!

✨In my work with mothers, and as a mother myself, the topic of feeling pressure to be perfect comes up a lot. In counseling, you can learn to let go of the pursuit of perfection, and instead, revel in the beauty of your unique imperfections.

✨Imperfection is a testament to your authenticity. Every wrinkle, every scar, every moment of doubt, your laughter, your tears, your mistakes—they all contribute to what makes you an irreplaceable force in your child’s world.

✨You are not defined by the standards of others; you are defined by the love you give, the sacrifices you make, and the unwavering commitment to nurturing those you hold dear.

✨Taking care of your mental health as a parent is not only an act of self-love but also a gift you can give to your children.

✨Reach out today to schedule a free 15 minute phone consultation.

https://meggiezanger.com/contact-1
(858) 256-6786

It does not matter…

❤️‍🩹 how far along you were in your pregnancy…
❤️‍🩹 if the pregnancy was planned or unplanned…
❤️‍🩹 whether you wanted this pregnancy or not…
❤️‍🩹 how many children you have…
❤️‍🩹 if you terminated for medical reasons….
❤️‍🩹 if you had an ectopic pregnancy...
❤️‍🩹 if you had a blighted o**m...

A loss, is a loss, is a loss.

And you are allowed to feel, grieve, process, and share in whatever way is right for you.

❤️‍🩹Similar to a missed miscarriage, this is a uniquely painful type of loss because all can seem normal until you go in for your first ultrasound appointment. Your body is showing all the signs of being pregnant, but there is no baby. The news comes as a shock, and it can feel as if your body is playing a cruel trick on you.

❤️‍🩹If you have experienced a loss due to a blighted o**m, you are not alone. When you are ready, reach out for support.

**m

Yesterday I had a blast connecting with so many mamas and their partners alongside my fellow Bay Area perinatal health providers at the Blossom Birth and Family gathering event!

And it wouldn’t be a tabling event without my special helper. 🥰

🌸This Saturday, October 28th, I will be tabling at the Blossom Birth and Family Gathering in Mitchell Park, Palo Alto from 10am-12:30pm. We will be gathered around the Multi-Use Bowl area of the park:
https://www.cityofpaloalto.org/files/assets/public/v/1/community-services/facility-rentals/reservations-community-centers-fields/picnic-reservations/mitchellparkmap.pdf

🌸This is an opportunity for new parents, or those on their journey to parenthood, to connect with local providers who support fertility, pregnancy, and postpartum needs.

🌸At this fair you will meet perinatal mental health therapists such as myself, as well as doulas, pelvic floor therapists, midwives, chiropractors, lactation consultants, and other maternal wellness providers.

🌸So stop on by, bring your family or a friend, and I'd love to introduce myself!

❤️‍🩹A missed miscarriage is often detected during a routine prenatal exam when the provider is unable to detect a heartbeat.

❤️‍🩹This is a uniquely painful type of loss because all can seem normal from the outside and due to the lack of miscarriage symptoms, it can come as a shock. It can feel as if your body has betrayed you in some way.

❤️‍🩹Treatment for a missed miscarriage can include:
• Waiting for the miscarriage to happen by itself naturally
• Taking medicine to help things along (access to effective medication can be limited by your state laws)
• Having surgery to remove the pregnancy

❤️‍🩹Unless you or someone close to you has experienced this type of loss, you likely haven’t heard of it. If this is something you have experienced in the past or are currently experiencing, know that you are not alone and there are many ways to get support. I'm happy to help when you are ready.

Miscarriages are very common (1 in 4 pregnancies) but rarely talked about. This silence can make the experience even more difficult. If someone chooses to tell you about their miscarriage, keep these guidelines in mind when considering how to respond.

Try to avoid platitudes, silver linings, and anything that starts with the words, “at least.” Remember that everyone experiences miscarriage differently. Many people feel a great loss, sadness, or emptiness, but others can feel a sense of relief. All feelings are valid, natural, and allowed.

🌸October is Pregnancy and Infant and Loss Awareness Month.

🌸The forget-me-not flower is a symbol of pregnancy and infant loss.

🌸In the U.S. alone, 1 in 4 pregnancies ends in miscarriage and 2.4 million fetal and neonatal deaths occur in the perinatal period.
- Institute of Reproductive Grief Care.

🌸This type of loss is uniquely painful and often disenfranchised. After experiencing a perinatal loss, one of the biggest fears and pain points for a parent is that their child will be forgotten. Incorporating the forget-me-not flower as a symbolic component of a parent’s grief and healing journey can be a way to keep their child’s memory alive.

🎤 DROP

Oof. Did this moment from the movie "Barbie" resonate with you as much as it did me?

Gloria’s monologue perfectly encapsulated the complex and challenging journey of womanhood, especially when it comes to being a mother.

In the words of Gloria, it’s time we stop, “tying ourselves up in knots so that people will like us.”

✨You are enough and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.✨

❤️‍🩹This image from The Postpartum Stress Center rings true for so many new moms.

😔It's OK to not be fine, and you don't have to pretend like you are.

🫶This is a season, and you don't have to go through it alone.

❤️Call, email, or DM for help today.