Beverly J. Matthews, Psychotherapist

We know how to vent, complain, whine and whisper about our shortcomings to ourselves and others. We energize and entertain the thoughts which suggest our inadequacies. Naturally, we are left feeling disheartened by the variety of ways we don't measure up. Many of us can easily cite the reasons for being disappointed in ourselves. What would it mean to put wood on the fire of self-worth and self-regard? How might it feel to howl to the moon of our heart and illuminate what we honor.

When we stoke the embers here, we are heartened by the warmth of our spirit. This is the flame that burns the illusion of being unworthy. Ram Dass said, "Our whole spiritual transformation brings us to the point where we realize that in our own being, we are enough". We are much too devoted to making the case that we are not. This is one of the ways in which we are wedded to our suffering. We are afraid of being arrogant, self-centered or too prideful. We don't need a Good-Year blimp to fly over our town highlighting our value. We must simply turn our attention to an inner acknowledgment.

It is important to name and claim the moments we are moved by our heart. Some of us feel uncertain about who we are and where we are headed. Perhaps not feeling "called" to a larger purpose. When we cultivate a repository of deeply knowing what we bring to this pot luck called life, we have clarity. We don't need to diminish that by the myth that it must be perfect. Just begin a conversation with yourself with, "I am proud of you and here's why". There is a sacredness in bringing the energy of "Namaste" to the dialogue within. "I honor the divine in you".

We can hold a mirror in which we see what awakens gratitude for ourselves. You can polish the dust on the eyes of those who couldn't see you. The residue of their disappointment may continue to hold meaning. Turn the page to now. Allow the eyes of your heart to see the gift that you are. When we howl such truth, we feel the reverberations of love cascading through our being. Touch that. The window dressing of shame is the effort of mind to create doubt. We are not that. I bow to the goodness in each of you. I am touched daily by it.

--Mitch Davidowitz

We’ve all been given experience that we’ve been unable to process consciously. This is one of the basic characteristics of trauma, unendurable emotional pain that hasn’t been able to find a relational home in which it can be held.

There are times in my clinical work when I’ll meet with someone who is really suffering, but they can’t actually feel that pain. They’re not able to make contact with the felt quality of the open wound.

Instead, there’s a protective numbing, a dissociative shut down and collapse into the somatic unconscious. From here, the lost orphans of psyche and soma burn, ache, and long for holding.

This response is coherent and makes sense based on what happened earlier in their lives, and was an adaptive response in the face of survival-level anxiety and annihilatory panic, to the very real threat of psychic disintegration.

Trauma is the experience of de-linking – left and right, top and bottom, limbic and cortical, body and mind – and linkage occurs through the felt sense of safety.

Where we find a way, guided by mercy and grace, to touch that experience, hold it in love, make sense of it, and integrate it into a new cohesive narrative.

Slow and safe. I’m with you, and you’re safe. I’m with you and you’re safe. You’re no longer alone. And you’re safe.

While insight and clarity can be supportive, it is right-brain immersion in fields of safety which fosters cellular restructuring.

The psyche will reassemble when it feels safe.

The body will reorganize when it feels safe.

--Matt Licata

"True healing is not simply a matter of becoming symptom free by any means necessary. That would support beliefs in superstition by suggesting there is no higher purpose for the conditions you are facing. When caught in a healing crisis, your body is put into a cocoon-like stage of incubation, where much rest, nourishment, and often the assistance of supplements or even medicine allows the body, mind, heart, and soul to align, get on the same page, and inspire the integration of your highest vibration of light into physical form.

In order for this to occur, one must willingly transition from an outdated level of consciousness and move into higher aspects as a rite of passage throughout your ever-growing expansion. Most symptoms, whether requiring naturopathic, energetic, or medical attention symbolize the dying off of the old self as the new self emerges. All too often, before you can sense the fresh horizons of a new reality, you are given the opportunity to thank the old self for taking you as far as it was meant to go and send it home to Source.

This can be confusing because so many beings are currently at the precipice of a new reality, yearning to release the old self, but it is being done from a space of rejection, where the focus is eliminating the inconveniences that inspire your most profound awakening. When you are able to recognize true healing as nobody’s fault, but merely everyone’s opportunity to offer gratitude for all the past experiences that have prepared you for greater adventures ahead, you are able to accelerate your healing journey without rejecting any part of yourself along the way.

When healing is not a race against time to recreate an ego structure under more desirable circumstances, but an opportunity to move into a higher level of consciousness, where self-love, compassion for others, and greater patience become more instinctive, the Universe recognizes your readiness to evolve by reminding your body of its innate ability to heal itself. Healing is not a matter of trying to figure out what you did wrong in order to manifest such a predicament. It is a time-honored celebration of how quickly you are evolving, where the need for your body, mind, heart, and soul to align causes a variety of symptoms to emerge.

Spiritual healing is not necessarily resolved by modalities, nor is any form of medicine less than the path of your highest potential. Whatever your body, mind, heart, and soul require in order to align and integrate is precisely what you should offer yourself. As always, please trust in the immaculate grace of your own divine guidance to know what is best for you. When in doubt, please find more time and space to be still, silent, and open for the guidance that life intends to offer you.

May the one who wishes to speed up the process or is only interested in evolution under preferable circumstances be loved more, not less. May each stage of healing be savored no matter how exhausting or excruciating it feels as the old self dissolves. As always, your greatest healing remains your deepest surrender. It’s not a matter of how long it seems to last, but only how willing you are to love yourself through it, whether embracing yourself seems to make any immediate difference or not. In every breath, you deserve more love, not less. This is the way of heart-centered consciousness." - Matt Kahn

Experiencing love, sharing your love, being love. 🤍

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“She sat at the back and they said she was shy,
She led from the front and they hated her pride,
They asked her advice and then questioned her guidance,
They branded her loud, then were shocked by her silence,
When she shared no ambition they said it was sad,
So she told them her dreams and they said she was mad,
They told her they'd listen, then covered their ears,
And gave her a hug while they laughed at her fears,
And she listened to all of it thinking she should,
Be the girl they told her to be best as she could,
But one day she asked what was best for herself,
Instead of trying to please everyone else,
So she walked to the forest and stood with the trees,
She heard the wind whisper and dance with the leaves,
She spoke to the willow, the elm and the pine,
And she told them what she'd been told time after time,
She told them she felt she was never enough,
She was either too little or far far too much,
Too loud or too quiet, too fierce or too weak,
Too wise or too foolish, too bold or too meek,
Then she found a small clearing surrounded by firs,
And she stopped...and she heard what the trees said to her,
And she sat there for hours not wanting to leave,
For the forest said nothing, it just let her breathe" From
Author Becky Hemsley

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