JXN Ministries

"The Son of Man has come to seek out and to give life to those who are lost." Luke 19:10 (TPT)

If you are one of the lucky few who knows that everyone in their circle knows, loves, and lives for Jesus, then I celebrate with you. I invite your heart to be broken with the rest of us who have someone dear to our hearts whose souls we pray for regularly. Praying for those we love is a heavy burden at times. It weighs on our hearts because the possibility of an eternity without them makes us sad. That sadness motivates us to fast and pray in a way that few other issues can. It's hard to fathom that Christ loves us more than we love our own. We can be assured that if Christ loves us that much, He loves them too. He is drawing them, working His way past their outter defenses and into the depths of their hearts. Our job is to PRAY and then to TRUST Him. It's His job to save them, not ours. It is our responsibility to live with integrity, setting good examples. His job is to point them to authenticity and away from hypocrisy.

Reread Luke 19:10 again... what do you notice? One little word is illuminated in my mind's eye more than the others, the tiny word OUT. Lately, out has become a curse word for me. Reading or hearing it starts an automatic replay of a conversation with one of my sons. His use of the word in conversation about God, life, gender, sin, and His choices pushed me beyond everything I had ever prepared myself for as a parent. I was prepared for a lot of things, but never this. This shattered me and brought to the end of myself and my ability to fix. To tell your pastor parents that your life choices do not sign up with the Word of God is one thing, but to tell your pastor parents that "even if God existed, I don't think I would serve him", is heart shattering.

I have since learned that coming to the end of myself isn't only about me, it is about all that I hold dear. The end of me was actually not a very long trip and I was quite willing to surrender myself to the journey and let God take over. But this coming to the end of alI that matters most to me... my husband, my children, my child - in -love, that is a much longer, much rockier journey.

The day after our heart shattering conversation I wrote these words in my journal, "Lord, I dedicated him to you as a baby, today, I release him back to you, so You can take him through what You need to allow, to make him into a MAN!"

I stand on Luke 19:10 today and I invite you to stand with me. Today I release my child all over again and trust the Jesus will SEEK HIM OUT! Go to the places I can not go, hunt him down and overtake him with His love and mercy! I choose to surrender myself to this journey, knowing that the destination will be worth the rocky road to get there. I rest in the knowledge that I did what God asked me to do; I planted the Word within him, and now I wait for the harvest. I do not surrender to the enemy's lies that this is our fault that somehow we failed him. I realize that this is his journey to the end of himself and I trust that Jesus is already there at the end of the road, waiting for him to fall off horse in response to the overwhelming glory of Christ.

Lord, may I never forget that as much as I love, your love far exceeds my comprehension of authentic love. I promise to pray for and love others into your kingdom. Break my heart, not only for my friends and family, but break my heart for ALL SOULS.

If you have children you are praying for, I invite to drop their names in the comments, or send us a private message, so we can unite in prayer for Jesus to SEEK THEM OUT!

I love you,
Shannon Jackson

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