Integrative Psychotherapy

Have you ever find yourself stuck in negative self-talk? Thoughts like, 'I'm such a failure' or 'I'll never be good enough' can feel convincing, but they’re rarely true.
Negative self-talk often develops from early life experiences, especially in childhood. When we face criticism, high expectations, or negative feedback from parents, teachers, or peers, we start to internalize those messages. Over time, these experiences create 'inner voices' or parts of our psyche that echo those criticisms, almost as a way to protect us from failure, rejection, or disappointment. But what started as a way to help us adapt can limit us later by making us feel like we’re not 'good enough' or that we need to meet impossible standards.
Understanding this origin helps us see that these thoughts aren’t the whole truth—they’re just old voices shaped by our past.
In adulthood, negative self-talk chips away at our confidence and keeps us from reaching our full potential. But here’s how to fight back:
1. Reframe those thoughts—change 'I'm a failure' to 'I'm still learning.'
2. Show self-compassion—talk to yourself like you would to a friend.
3. Challenge each thought—ask yourself, 'Is this really true?' More often than not, there’s no real evidence behind it.
Remember, these thoughts are often just the internalized voices of others from our childhood. You’re stronger than those negative thoughts, so start talking to yourself like someone you truly care about.

TikTok · OnlineTherapy Check out OnlineTherapy’s video.

Abuse may take different forms, it can be physical, sexual, emotional, psychological and financial.
Emotional and psychological are the hardest to recognise but they are ver harmful. It will lower your self-esteem, you can beging to doubt yourself and doubt your perception of reality. In the end you may feel traped.
Emotionally abused people are often too wounded to endure the relationship any longer, but also too afriad to leave. So the cycle repeats itself, until something is done.
If you are in a place where you may be emotionally abused or you start seeing red flags, having psychotherapy can help you to put this relationship into perspective while also providing tools for overcomming the abuse.
Remember you are not alone!

According to the attachment theory by Dr Bolby (1968) your adult bonds tend to mirror those we first established with your caregivers. ⁣
⁣
Now think about your relationship with your caregivers when you were a child or teenager what message did you get back then about relationships? How your current relationships (romantic and friendships) looks like? Is that dynamic familiar to you? ⁣
⁣
Childhood trauma can look like: ⁣
- having unavailable emotionally father or mother⁣
- having narcissistic caregiver⁣
- witnessing or experiencing emotional/physical/sexual abuse⁣
- emotional neglect ⁣
- bullying ⁣
- history of severe illness or ongoing treatment ⁣
Just to name a few.⁣
⁣
Going back to childhood and adolescences usually sheds some light on adult behaviour. The ways in which our caregivers interact with us, as well as each other, shape our view of the world and those around us. ⁣
This will in turn affect 3 fundamental structures: our sense of self, the way we communicate and how we form relationships. Unless we do the work to develop more self awareness of our behaviours we will usually repeat these same patterns in adulthood. ⁣
⁣
Doing the work to unlearn dysfunctional patterns is essential to interpersonal growth and it’s possible.

An apology in relationships is very important, helps rebuild trust, connection and upsets. ⁣
⁣
But when someone hurts you and give you toxic or fake apology, it does makes things worst, as then you don’t feel seen, heard and respected! ⁣
⁣
What does the toxic apology can sounds like? This post shares some examples. ⁣
⁣
Often fake apology makes excuses, avoid responsibility and invalidate your emotions. ⁣
⁣
Also when someone make apologies left and right without taking any real actions to improve themselves, that’s not an apology that’s a manipulation tactics. ⁣
⁣

Manipulation is the exercise of harmful influence over others. People who manipulate others attack their mental and emotional sides to get what they want.⁣
⁣
Manipulation sometimes can be very subtle, you can’t really point finger at what is wrong. But your gut feeling is telling you that something is off. That’s why is worth having look at those behaviours and asking yourself a question if you are experiencing any of those. ⁣
⁣
If you feel like you may be getting manipulate by loved one, friend, coworker it is important to reach out to a trusted resource to find help.