Deepika Bhandari Therapy

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They may be messy, difficult, scary, and difficult to articulate, but our emotions are central to who we are and how we view and understand things. Maybe it’s time to stop viewing and thinking about emotions from a problem solving approach but to sit with them, understand them, and work with them as an essential part of life.

One of the most important things to understand about the autism spectrum is that it is a spectrum disorder. Spectrum disorders mean they show up differently in different people and with different levels of intelligence. This also means that for the treatment, one size fits all cannot work.

My first memory of Holi is me as a 5 year old running from a teen in my building who thought smelly muck would be a good substitute for Gulal. This teen didn’t care who was in their attack range except that they had their fun. Every Holi since, I’ve had similar experiences to such an extent that a conversation around Holi is equivalent to a conversation around consent.
It’s simple really, and comes down to 2 things -
1. Do what you want in a way that doesn’t trample the rights of another. Just like you deserve to do what you want, as do they.
2. Respect another person’s response to your wish. A no means no.

For too long mental health has been looked at with the same approach for people from varying backgrounds with different kinds of things that they might be going through. It’s time we stop the one shoe fits all and acknowledge the individual struggle that a person goes through and work through it with them, in a way that works for them.
Love this illustration of this concept by

Hurt is a subjective emotion. The experience of it is based on the person who says they are hurt. No one else gets to decide that for them. That is not to say that the reasons you may have to hurt someone may not be valid, however questioning someone else’s experience of an emotion is extremely invalidating for them. If someone is reaching out to you saying something hurt them, you can respond to them by understanding their experience of it, and working toward resolving it, when you both are ready.

Isn’t this a pictorial representation of us today? We are just trying to focus on things that we want to do, look forward to, try something new and bammm just then.... the brain comes in and then our thoughts come in.

At this point, you’re probably almost giving into what the brain is saying, reminding you of things that you did or words that you said in the past and here is where you make the final call - to listen or to not to the brain.

Working on yourself is a difficult process that requires accessing situations and scenarios that we'd prefer to avoid. This contributes to maintaining the patterns and keeps emotions around them constant. When we make an active choice to work on these patterns and emotions, it requires us to relook and reevaluate major aspects of our life. Showing yourself compassion in such moments goes a long way.

We don’t think single thoughts or in isolation. We think with a slew of ideas that are interconnected and related to one another. We can break this chain of thoughts whenever we want by moving away from the thought or doing something else. However, with anxiety, breaking out of this thought cycle becomes very difficult, which we more commonly refer to as a thought spiral. This mostly happens because the nervous system is in overdrive and cannot relax.

There are a lot of ways to deal with anxiety. These happen to be our favourite. Mostly because these moments help you draw a connection with yourself and disconnect from the anxiety.
Credits to for this beautiful illustration.

Anxiety is a feeling that is difficult to live with, and all of us have felt it at some point or the other. We would all prefer not to have to feel it, or if it just goes away. At no point have we tried to sit down, have a conversation and understand our anxiety. Let's sit down and try to understand what our anxiety is saying to us.

Understanding the discomfort that anxiety brings is the first step to working through it.

Drop a💜 if you agree with us!

The start of a new month always prompts in us a desire for change, and a will to do something new. With a few short ways and techniques, we can alter our thinking patterns, and take the first step in moving past things that keep us stuck. Embark with us on this new diet, and tell us how the process went for you.

Every time you do something to promote loving yourself, say it out loud, and to yourself. The more you say it, and point it out, the more you’ll observe it.

Simplicity is about deciding what’s important to you and focusing on that before anything else!

You can’t wrap love in a box, but can wrap a person in a hug, this time instead of hugging someone, hug yourself and say you’ve got this!

This one needs no explanation. Make a promise to yourself, for yourself.

We cannot become what we want to be by remaining what we are
List 3 things you think bring you comfort! Share with us in the comments section.

As important as it is to set goals and ideals for ourselves, it is extremely important to celebrate ourselves. The starting point for self-love is realising that there are multiple beautiful things about you and they deserve to be acknowledged. Do one thing for yourself today, it could be anything, anything at all!
Do share in the comments if you'd like!