Mookyteh vall

Unatafuta boyfriend ako na gari,,
Na wewe mwenyewe huna sura ya kukaa mbele ya gari😴😴
Umfanyie nini sasa, 😃

I pranked my girlfriend that I saw her going at a lodge with a man yesterday...she apologized and said that they only kissed
Mnifollow aki please

This morning was vomiting,so I decided to go to pharmacy and buy pregnancy test,
On my way I remembered am a man
Good morning

Unakopesha girlchild 4k kuenda kudai anakuita mperfect,unachanganyikiwa unaongeza 1k inakuwa 5k
Good day

Bibi hapigwi akileta kiburi mpandishe cheo aitwe bibi mkubwa
Afrikan proverb 😄😄

Thanks for 500 followers 🙏🙏

Tangu niote nafanya harusi na mkisii nowdays naomba ndio nilale
Good evening
Nice weekend

Ati mwalimu wa math hapa n wapi ,na ulipewa leakage ya math na bado ukashindwa kupata 2%
Tuliza kijana

Keep on following Oscar juma da prof

Kuwakumbusha tu watoto wa 2005 wako na 18 Years

Maringo iambatane na sura jamani,😏 huoni unakaa omena 🙊😹

Alafu kichwa ilikuwa inapata math na chem 10 ndio unazuka na 2k
Which law of mathematics are you using 😥😔😔

Kitambo honeymoon was meant for breaking virginity 😋siku hizi mnaendanga kufanya Nini🙄

To GIRLS:

He saw you and fell in love with you❤ He asked you to be his girlfriend ❤ and you accepted him❤ he was so fond of you ❤you both went to everywhere together💕took pictures of yourselves, spent lots of time together 😍 Weeks passed, months ❤ and everything seemed perfect ❤He couldn't stay a day without setting his eyes on you ❤ He introduced you to his friends as his girlfriend and the woman he would love to get married to 💞 He showed you love, care ❤ and did everything to make sure you were happy 😍 You went on a date with your friends 😒 met this new guy who developed interest in you 😍 he said you were beautiful ❤ told you all the sweet things you've never heard.. I guess ❤ you fell for it ❤ you both got hooked up ❤ things started to change 💔 You start comparing him with your guy ❤ he's more handsome than your man 😍 he has a car and looks more wealthier ❤ you try all means to make your man get tired of you so you could ask for a break 💔 you succeeded 💔 you're now with the new guy forgetting everything your man did for you 💔 you never knew he's a player ❤ and has a fiancee he's intending to marry 😥 you found out 💔 you're heart broken 😥 you wanna go back to your man 😥 but it's late 💔 he has moved on ❤ now you've lost a diamond💎 while trying to chase a stone... that's when you know the difference between LOVE and LUST..
❤😥💔😩💕😔💞!
*Once a guy's heart gets broken.. He finds it hard to love again..💔
*Never compare your man to someone else❤
*Try to build your man to the person you want him to be.. ❤
*The fact he doesn't have a car today doesn't mean he's not gonna have one tomorrow.. Give him time!
🕊️

The first time I saved 10k in a bank , I used to walk around the bank every morning to ensure the bank is there

Unakataa kuna Dem yangu naenda kwa mganga nakuroga unakufa nakuja kwa mazishi yako ,nakula nashiba nafurahi ikizikwa......endeleza

😜😜Things that define Africans*😂😂😂
1. Urinating behind the latrine🚽💦
2. Wife sleeping next to the wall🛌😴
3. Keeping brooms behind the door😂
4. When you get rich, people say you have a 🐍😁
5. When you get old, you're a witch😒💔
6. When you take a bath , they will ask if you are going somewhere.🤨
7. Keeping some plates, cups and spoons aside specifically for visitors.😏🤔
8. Counting pieces of meat.🍖🍛
9. No natural d£ath in Africa.... your enemy is always the cause.🥺😭
10. Counting money after withdrawing from ATM.😅😜
11. Marrying a beautiful woman is associated with marrying a prostitute.😟🥵
12. There are some special parts of the chicken meat that are always reserved for the husband (eg. Gizzard)🥶🤬
13. Removing shoes when walking in the mud.🤥😇
14. Buying new clothes when it is Christmas.🤧🥳
15. When one is given a microphone, they first blow air into it or tap it with a finger, to test it if it is working, (even when the person passing it on was using the same mic.)🥱🎤
16. Sweeping the whole compound when expecting visitors.😂
17. Looking left and right when crossing a one way street.😁
18: Keeping an empty plastic water bottle after drinking, for future use.🤥
19: Reserving a special chair for the Husband 😒💔
20: Feeling proud when sitting next to a white person in a bus.🤓😍
*I am a proud African*

Unaforce relationships kumbe your soul mate alikuwa aborted😥😥😥

And today London is red
Come on Manchester 🔥🔥
Tukutane Antarctica 7:30pm ,,
Anybody around nispoil yeye

Alafu unapata tu fan wa Chelsea ako tu sure watashinda weekend 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Other countries,,,.hey darling am pregnant,,
Then my country we mwanaume ujue umeniharibia maisha,,wakenyaaaaa

Stano:hey beb
Joy:😉😉😉
Stano:N nini babe sikuelewi aki?
Joy:🙄🙄🙄
Stano:kuwa serious cutie
Joy:🙆🙆🙆
Stano: Akh ilove you kam arsenal team yangu😹
Joy:🙂🙂🙂
Stano : ok, ile pesa uliniambia nikutumie nitume kwa hii no ama ile ingne ?
Joy: pole bae , simu ilikuwa na mtoi but tuma kwa ile no ingne , hii iko na fuliza beb😍😍
Stano:😎😎
Joy:Beb ndio nini sasa?
Stano:😚😚
Joy: utatuma ama
Stano:😈😈
Joy:kwendah nilijua huna pesa ghasia wew
Stano:kwa mpesa wataleta jina gani 🙆
Joy:joy mbolo nyakende , I love you beb💕💕
Stano:👁🙊🙊😏😜😜🤣🤣
Joy:utakufa k**a umesimama kevo🙄😑😑
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂Jus for laughs 🤣🤣🤣

Part 2 Brayo and kevo are genius part 2😆

Brayo 👉 you mean akuja bro
Kevo👉 we acha ujinga ebu unda keja sai charity anafika apo in next 5 minutes 😆
Brayo 👉 haha wàa sawa man ndio maana nakupendaga sana 😁
Kevo 👉😂wewe ni bure kabsaa na ujue kuna vita apo Leo 🤣
Brayo 👉 😳 Vita tena aje buana 😄 c unajua mm naogopa
Kevo 👉 wewe ngoja upangwe 😂

(After brayo kuunda keja kumbe cousin yake nae amekam kumkotea apo kwake😆) usisahau charity nae ako kwa njia anakuja kuona brayo ako na dem yupi)
Charity anashuka apo kwa gate 😄
Mtu wa nduthi👉 hey ngojea balance
Charity 👉 keep change na ujue kunakufa mtu huku Leo 😟
Mtu wa nduthi 👉 Madam umenipea 1k instead of jwani
(Charity ako confused alikuw ameenda anaacha change so anarudi aste aste!)
Charity 👉 Ooh you mean cjakupea pesa enough ebu shika na hizi Leo kunakufa mtu walai ghai nonoo
Mtu wa nduthi 👉 noo madam pesa umenipea ni mingi mm ndo nafaa nukurudishie
Charity 👉 wee enda na hizo na usisahau kuna mtu anakufa apa
Charity anaongeza mtu wa nduthi 2so inakuw 1200 😆) kuingia kwa compound anapata sis ya brayo anafakia 😄)
Charity 👉 wew ebu kuja hata ww huwez niambia na vile ulikua rafiki yangu😥 pia ni msicha Tu k**a mm😭
Sis brayo 👉😳 charity ni nn mbaya unahema ww na unaongelea nn please
Charity 👉 unataka kujifanya hujui sio najua ni deal msha plan but for your information leo MTU anakufa apa kwenu
(Charity anaanza kutembea kuelekea kwa keja🚶 kumbe mama brayo amesikia makelele na anatoka nje)
Mama brayo 👉 Makelele ni za nn huku nje😟
(Charity anamfogea mama Brian)
Charity 👉 Ooh ni wew hata ww uko kwa hii deal😢 huwez kumbuka Ile dress nilikubuyia ak dunia ni mbaya 😭
Mama brayo 👉 ooh charity ni wewe mum nn mbaya ebu njoo uniambie nn mbaya mummie 🤔
Charity 👉 siwez kuja penye uko najua unataka nikuje ndio atoroke
Mama brayo 👉 Charity are you okay 🤔
Charity 👉 unauliza nani ebu niaje ujue kunakufa mtu huku kwako
(Usisahau brayo ako kwa keja na cousin yake wanabonga😄)
Part 3 on the Wa

Another sign of poverty is believing arsenal will win the EPL 🙈🙈🤭🤭

Kichwa ilikuwa inapata chem na math 10 % ndio unataka nikupee 1k ya kushuka,,,,,which of mathematics are you applying

Follow my page 🤗 for more funny episodes,,then remember to invite your friends to,to like nawapenda sana ,jamaa wangu

Brayo👉 hey babe
Charity 👉 hey too darling
Brayo 👉 beb nakumiss nataka ukam Leo
Charity 👉 Sina fare ebu tuma nikuje

Brayo 👉 Niaje kevo
Kevo 👉 poa we mjinga niambie 😄
Brayo👉 Charity amekaa kukam kuniona aty hana fare
Kevo👉 haha iyo tu 😆 Ebu ngoja kiasi

Kevo 👉 hey charity mamboz
Charity 👉 poa sana kevo habari ya brayo wangu
Kevo👉 hehe aty brayo wako 😁c mliachana aty, hadi brayo sai ako na dem mwingine kwa keja, dem amebeba ako na haga alafu mrembo na ni mweupeee wee sema mtoto wa wenyewe kanaswa kweli
Charity 👉 Aty koo ako na dem mwingine kwa keja sai 😳
Kevo 👉 Eeh ww mwenyewe kuja ujionee Tu
Charity 👉 Nakuja Tu si dakika 5 nko apo
Kevo 👉 Sawa ww pita tu hadi kwa nyumba

Kevo 👉 We mjinga umeunda nyumba ama unangoja dem yako apate ikiwa chafu 😂
Brayo 👉 you mean anakuja 😂😛
Part 2 is coming soon 😁

Follow for more