Psiholog Elena Tonciu

Kind reminder 🫶

The moon doesn’t have to be full and bright every night to be loved...

One of the greatest barriers to empathy is the fear of saying the wrong thing or the need to make everything better. When someone has experienced something very traumatic - a significant loss - there’s nothing you can say to make it better. All you can do is to be with people in that space. So if all you can come up with is, ‘I don’t know what to say. I just know that I want to be with you in this. I don’t know how to make it better. I just know that I’m dying inside to make it better. I want to help.’ What we all need when we’re in struggle is the ability for other people to look us in the eye, to be with us, to embrace us, and to be willing to be with us. ~Brené Brown

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We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married, have a baby, then another. Then we are frustrated that the kids aren't old enough, and we'll be more content when they are.
After that, we're frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We will certainly be happy when they are out of that stage.We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our partner gets his or her act together when we get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice holiday, when we retire.
The truth is, there's no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when?
Your life will always be filled with challenges.
It's best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway.
A quote comes from Alfred D. Souza. He said,
"For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, or a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life."
This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way.
So, treasure every moment that you have and treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time...and remember that time waits for no one.
So, stop waiting until you lose ten pounds, until you gain ten pounds, until you have kids, until your kids leave the house, until you start work, until you retire, until you get married, until you get divorced, until Friday night, until Sunday morning, until you get a new car or home, until your car or home is paid off, until spring, until summer, until winter, until your song comes on, until you've had a drink.... there is no better time than right now to be happy.
Happiness is a journey, not a destination.
Work like you don't need money,
Love like you've never been hurt,
And dance like no one's watching.

😆👀🎉

Priveste partea buna! 🥑

Conferinta IRPI 2023 - PSIHOTERAPIA VIITORULUI

Thankful for such an interesting week.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT

CREDIT Dr.Siggie - PhD - Parenting Expert

When children are starting to say "no" they are actually developmentally gaining independence and realising that they have some
choices. This is a positive stage in development although is certainly doesn't feel like it at
times. If we recognise that our children want some control we shouldn't react by taking more
control away from them. This doesn't mean giving in to them, but for example, if they don't
want to have a shower, give them a choice. Do they want to have a shower before dinner or
after? For young children it might be choosing their plate even though they can't choose their dinner. They are still doing what you want but they feel that they have some control over their own life.

More information on my blog
https://www.thetherapistparent.com/post/how-to-stop-yelling

Powerful reminder. 🧡

Children will become who you say they are.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
Say they are 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘵…they will believe they are 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘵.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
Say they are 𝘴𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘺…oh, you will get some 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘦.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
Say they are 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘧𝘶𝘭...they will 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘦𝘵 to bring their homework home every day and never "know" where anything is.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
Say they are 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯...they will be 𝘳𝘶𝘥𝘦 to you, their siblings, and friends at school.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
Say they are 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥...they will tell the kid who feels left out to come play with them, look to help the teacher and comfort a crying friend. ⁣⁣
⁣
Say they 𝘤𝘢𝘯 become a singer, dancer, or doctor…and they will always try.⁣
⁣⁣
Who we think they are matters.⁣⁣
It will become their inner voice.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
If we tell someone something enough⁣⁣
they believe it—⁣⁣
especially our impressionable, vulnerable kids.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
𝐒𝐨, 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐧 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐭, 𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭, 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐝𝐨 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐟𝐨𝐫.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
𝐁𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲’𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞. ⁣

✍️:
📸:

thank you

With Great Love
"We can do no great things.
Only small things with great love."
Mother Teresa

Recomand❤️

Dragi părinți,

Dacă vă doriți ca în această vară copiii voștri să se cunoască mai bine și să învețe importanța și rolul emoțiilor în viața lor, vă invit la cursul de dezvoltare personală: Emoții în culori, alături de colega mea de profesie Oana Ungureanu.

Pentru înscrieti puteți suna la numărul 0724332779 sau prin formularul de mai jos: https://forms.gle/np7YdhHSYhmbV4Er6

Don't race ahead and try and fix it, don't give them lots of things to do or think, just stop. When we stop with our child we are putting aside everything else and just focusing on them. They feel like you are with them and that they aren't alone.

More information on my blog:

When kids have big emotions, we tend to think they are being overly sensitive, that they need more resilience. Most of the time it is because there is a lot happening for the child that we can't see and don't know, that is pushing them beyond their means of coping. Instead we can change the response from they are overreacting, to seeing a child who has a lot happen for them, they are doing the best they can. They need our help not judgement.

I spend most of my time as a Psychologist teaching kids about feelings. It never stops amazing me how a lot of adults struggle at doing this. Feelings are there for a reason, we need to recognise them so we can manage them

When kids are little, sticking to Happy, Sad, Angry, Scared and Worried are fine. They are the building blocks for understanding emotions. However, as children get older we need to expand their emotional vocabulary. For example, there is a difference between feeling angry and disappointed or confused and frustrated. The way would would manage anger and disappointment are probably going to be different too.

More information on my blog:

https://www.thetherapistparent.com/post/feelings-feelings-and-more-feelings

Link in bio

Ai auzit de terapia prin ras?

In domeniul psihologiei rasul este foarte cunoscut pentru beneficiile sale.
Daca vrei sa functionezi la capacitate maxima incearca sa introduci macar o activitate amuzanta printre activitatile tale zilnice.
Umorul sporeste creativitatea si este un element cheie folosit pentru combaterea stresului. De asemenea, infrumuseteaza interactiunile sociale, imbunatateste parerea despre sine si ne poate schimba starea in bine.

Tu ai ras astazi? 😆

Ce rol au mâinile în interacțiunea cu ceilalți?

Știm foarte bine ca ne putem da seama de unele lucruri din limbajul verbal al unei persoane dar cm rămâne cu limbajul nonverbal? Este acesta important?
Comunicarea interumana se produce, în principal, printr-un limbaj verbal, dar, uneori, gesturile unei persoane ne transmit altceva fata de ceea ce rostește.
Tot aici putem vorbi și despre limbajul paraverbal, adică felul în care ne folosim vocea (volumul, timbrul, cursivitatea etc).
Despre limbajul nonverbal au scris mai mulți autori dar cel mai cunoscut este Paul Ekman, profesor la Universitatea din California care a ajutat la ecranizarea serialului "Lie to me", pe care îl recomand.

Încearcă sa observi ce faci cu mainile atunci când vorbești cu cei din jur, analizează-ți emoțiile și vezi cm te simți.

Plimbările în aer liber au multiple beneficii pentru minte și corp.
În fiecare zi creierul nostru este suprastimulat, lucru care determina creșterea nivelului de stres în organism, implicit și a nivelului de cortizol. Afectarea nivelului de cortizol poate sa ascundă o serie de afecțiuni precum: anxietate, depresie, probleme digestive, dureri de cap, oboseala, fluctuații de greutate, tulburări de somn etc. În astfel de cazuri este nevoie sa ii dam creierului nostru o pauza.
Studiile arata ca atât mersul prin natură cat și vizitarea unor locuri preferate pot îmbunătăți considerabil calitatea vieții și pot ameliora problemele descrise mai sus.
Astăzi este duminica. O zi în care putem vizita un parc, un muzeu, o galerie de arta, putem merge la un concert sau la o piesa de teatru, putem ieși cu prietenii sau cu familia.

Tu ce te-ai gândit sa faci astăzi pentru a te simți mai relaxat/a?

Sunt momente în care simțim că avem de făcut multe lucruri și nu ne ajunge timpul sau nu putem atinge deadline-urile. În astfel de momente avem tendința să punem presiune pe noi și să ne forțăm organismul.
În realitate, ritmul de funcționare al fiecăruia dintre noi este diferit.

Tu știi care este ritmul tau?

De curând am hotărât să mă mut din București în Iași. Vorbind cu o colegă din domeniul meu de activitate, am început să îi povestesc cm mă simt după această schimbare. Printre lucrurile pe care i le-am spus, a fost faptul că aici am întâlnit oameni foarte amabili, care m-au făcut să mă simt confortabil, oameni pasionați de ceea ce fac și care știu să îți arate acest lucru. Răspunsul ei a fost: "Ai simțit ceea ce ai proiectat."

Tu de câte ori ai proiectat ceea ce ai vrut sa primești?