SDSB

This year for Christmas, we here at SDSB would love to leave amazing deals and discounts in your stockings.

Get 30% off on Cough Syrup products, 2% off on Hemorrhoid Creams, 70% off on Idarucizumab, 55% on a Cough Drop scented Best Boss mug and much more. Wow what a deal!

But that's not all, by entering the code "SDSB HOHOHO" you get a special discount that could range from 10% all the way up to 11% on our Edible Baby Wipes, Chinese Tooth Paste, Soft As A Dead Kitten Toilet Paper and much more!

Enjoy all these wonderful gifts from us, your number 1 Pharmaceutical Company. Remember, all these specials ends on New Years so buy buy buy! Have a wonderful Christmas🎉🎁😍

今年的黑色星期五提前来到中国。使用代码 "ChinaRules"，您的下一个订单将获得 0.005%的折扣。我们保证，每一笔消费都能让我们的工厂童工在 2050 年前少挨饿！
This year Black Friday is coming to China early. Use code "ChinaRules" to get 0.005% off your next order. With every purchase we will guarantee to stride towards starving our child factory workers less by the year 2050, wow that a deal!

英尺
Feet

我们最亲爱的厂长Kiss Ly最近去了非洲，为我们神奇的公司打开了新的大门，但现在却被非洲军阀扣押了，要求赎金。我想平息一些传言。这不会影响到运输。
Our dearest Factory Manager Kiss Ly has recently went to Africa to open new doors for our amazing company but is now being held for ransom by African Warlords. I would like to lay some rumors to rest. This will not interfere with shipping.

我们的新工厂已经开业，这将使出货量增加58%，期待来自中国的巨大成就。
Our new Factories have been opened, this will increase shipments by 58%, expect great things from China

我们非常欢迎新的销售部长Ezzy加入我们的团队，她还拥有一只非常有性别歧视的柯基犬，这将使工厂的自杀率降低0.0001%!
We would love to welcome our new Minister Of Sales Ezzy to our team, she also owns a very sexist Corgi which will decrease factory su***de rates by 0.0001%!

哇哦! 新中国的黑奴，非常廉价的人
Wow! Black slaves is the new China, very cheap people!

业务进行得非常顺利，甚至更好的贿赂提议，非常低的价格
Business went very well, even better bribe offers, very low prices

啊，是的，非常好，过期的药丸卖得很好
ah yes very good, expired pills sell very well

活动非常成功，美国人得到的东西更便宜，而我们更富有
Event was a great success, America get stuff even cheaper while we get even richer😍

是的，非常勤奋的工人，对商业有利
Yes very hard workers, good for business

是的，在我们的新楼里有很多空间，有很多新的孩子，可以几乎不花钱就能做药。为美国感到高兴吧，你能便宜地得到我们的东西
Yes lot of space in new building, lots of new children to make medicine for almost nothing. Be glad America, you get our stuff cheap.

非常性感的新版本😍

English at bottom.

尊敬的客户、

由于最近我们的一家中国工厂发生了一起事件，所有的运输价格将在下个月开始提高。根据公司政策，我必须告诉你，我们尊贵的客户，上述事件。

在2023年5月12日下午4点27分左右，一名在我们工厂工作的10岁中国女孩被困在一艘离港的货物中。当上述货物到达中国边境时，该女孩在一次常规货物检查中被发现，但不幸的是，由于接触到我们的产品而导致辐射中毒死亡。

作为一家公司，我们想就任何延误和突然退款向我们的客户公开道歉。我们要向中国女孩的家人道歉，向他们提供代金券和礼品卡。由于这一不幸的挫折，我们现在不得不贿赂政府官员，以便将我们的产品送到你们，我们最亲爱的客户手中。

我想亲自感谢黄强接受了我们的贿赂，并亲自帮助将女孩埋葬在船厂地产外的一片美妙的油菜花田中。

真诚的、

米娅-沙利文 你友好的运输协调员

English:

Dear valued customers,

Due to a recent incident within one of our Chinese factories, all shipping prices will be raised start of next month. Due to company policy, I have to tell you, our valued customers, about said incident.

On 2023/05/12 at proximity 4:27 Pm, a 10-year-old Chinese girl working within our factory got trapped inside one of the departing shipments. When said shipment reached the Chinese border the girl was found in a regular cargo check, but unfortunately passed away due to radiation poisoning from exposure to our products.

We, as a company would like to publicly apologise to our customers for any delays and sudden refunds. We would like to apologise to the family of the Chinese girl by providing them with a voucher and gift card. Due to this unfortunate setback, we are now forced to bribe government officials to get our products into the hands of you, our dearest customers.

I would like to personally thank Huang Qiang for accepting our bribes and personally helping with burying the girl in a wonderful canola flower field outside the Shipyard property.

Sincerely,

Mia Sullivan your friendly Shipping Coordinator