Pneuma Counseling

Oofta. Who here has parented (or been) a high performing, high anxiety individual? How might this adjustment make a difference? How could it have made a difference for you?
When we overvalue success, we can easily miscommunicate that failure is unacceptable for ourselves and for others. This creates a fear motivated mentality which feeds that “anxiety monster” success promises (and fails) to abate.
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Prioritizing seasonal rhythm can be a powerful tool in maintaining mental health.
As holidays approach, it is okay to slow down, redefine holiday expectations, and promote relational connection in a different way.
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Did you know that compulsive behaviors (like washing hands and checking doors) are the primary stress reducing element of an obsessive mind?
Often times we think of the compulsive behavior as the stressor, “if only I didn’t have to check that door again my life would be more peaceful”, when it is the actual checking which brings (however temporary) that relief. This could mean the answer is in finding (ideally more manageable) alternative options to address the anxiety produced by that gnarly obsessive thought.
What are some ways you calm your mind? Are these ways serving you well?

It’s still November…let’s talk adoption and mental health.
This topic is tender. Likely, in part, due to all 3 experiences (that of the birth parents, the adoptive parents, and the adopted) often being misunderstood and misrepresented. Each adoption story is unique in both situation and personality, rendering the topic more complex and prone to over-generalization.
While adoption can personify the beauty, protection, and empowerment of chosen family, an adoptive family dynamic is born first of grief. This must be acknowledged before the dynamic can grow into healing, restoration, and connection.
Oftentimes family members experiencing any side of an adoption will have unique needs and complex emotions surrounding loss and connection. A place to express and process can help promote emotional and relational resilience as one navigates complex attachment.
If you find yourself in an adoptive family, try to work to see one another well, remember differences do not have to threaten connection, find your voice and communicate your unique needs. If you find yourself grieving adoptive elements in your own story. Allow yourself to grieve. Like re-setting a broken bone, this is how we heal well.

So often we expect ourselves to perform at the same level and in the same ways without allowing changing seasons to inform this performance. Each season has the capacity to teach us something, to inspire anew something that may have felt old, worn out, or missing altogether.
This Fall remember to adjust your expectations with the season. My intention is to allow myself more book time in front of the fire. What could yours be?
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Just a little clarity on a Wednesday. Words have meaning. Assess your individual needs and pursue meeting them with kindness🌱

For some, this time of year can create a sense of languish and isolation. Remind yourself today that growth looks different on each journey.
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Just a reminder from your friendly neighborhood therapist; love is not limited to romance and intimacy. We partner with many throughout our lives who invest, support, are supported by, and remain present with us through struggles, celebrations, pain, healing, and growth. Let’s not forget those important relationships today.
Happy Valentine’s Day.

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We tend to either deify or demonize our emotions; making them all that defines us or something to be snuffed out and defeated. This can essentially undermine human authenticity by suffocating both the power and finitude of emotional experience.
Take time today to feel…what sensations come up? How powerful are they? Where are you holding them? Then remind yourself, just like all emotions, these are temporary, meant to communicate and not to define…and let them go.

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Remember that grief presents itself in many ways, through many seasons, and IS NOT linear.
“I should be over this by now.”, “Why do I still get so emotional?!”, “Why can’t I cry? Something must be wrong with me.”…these are just a few messages and expectations we can put on ourselves when experiencing grief.
Give yourself grace, find safe people and places to express yourself, just be and let the process play out, and make an effort to adjust your expectations.

So often healthy sleep hygiene is overlooked when considering factors that might influence our overall mental health. Sleep does not only rest our physiological person, but is where our minds and emotions reset, adjust, and work toward resolution.
Consider the season you’re in. Are your bedtime habits serving your overall wellness? Is there room for adjustment?

PC: Innsightful

We can get lost putting impertinent value on our emotions (whether elevating them to the ultimate truth or disregarding them altogether) when, often, they are merely a specific form of communication.
Next time you are feeling an emotion, instead of judging whether the sensation is good or bad, a sign of power or weakness; try asking yourself what that emotion is trying to tell you and how you might respond.
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Just some reminders.

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Survival can look like over-performance, hyper vigilance, despondency, and other unexpected flavors of being.
Doing the work to do more than survive looks messy…but the results? Well that’s some of the most colorful and vibrant artwork we can experience.

PC: Unknown

A little something to remember, particularly, during the holiday season. You are so much more than your productivity. While innovation and “getting it done”-ness are valuable human attributes; creativity, relationship, and rest remind us of the reasons why we produce. You are not a machine.

PC: Unknown

Today I shared a trimming from my therapy plant. Today I saw hard work and dedication support a sense of relief and victory. We are able to cultivate a balanced life for ourselves, we are able to heal and move forward. You are.

Most of us have heard of the three fear responses, “fight, flight, freeze”. Did you know in recent years, a fourth response has been identified?
It’s important to remember that our fear responses are not isolated to one traumatic experience but can become our “go-to” source of safety when feeling a threat; and that some of our stories tell us we are constantly being threatened.

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“Nothing in our work may be more important than our willingness to bring as much of ourselves as possible to the therapeutic session” -Michael Kahn
HUGE shoutout to eMarie Photography for these new headshots 📸 You do amazing work!

Weather changes including a drop in temperature, shorter daylight hours, and shift in precipitation can impact our moods and affect mental health.
This impact may be amplified by routine restrictions related to things like…I don’t know…a global pandemic.
Remember in this season change to actively pursue fresh air and sunlight. Be in tune with what your body is telling you and take care of it. This intentionality can help mood regulation and overall lifestyle balance.

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We can all fall into dysfunctional patterns, particularly when engaging in long term relationships. Here are some signs you may need to make some moves to break unhealthy relational cycles.

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Manipulation: not an easy topic. Those engaging in manipulative behaviors are often convinced this is the best way for them to get their needs met. Sometimes our responses can not only protect us from toxic, manipulative cycles but also be the first step in empowering change in others.

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Often times it is tempting to believe our struggles and challenges can be solved with the right answer. Rarely is this the case. Healing is not about getting it right, it is about leaving room to feel in a way that empowers change, allowing you to take a step back and try a different perspective.

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Who has trouble saying “no”? 🙋🏼‍♀️ You aren’t alone! When we are unable to set boundaries for ourselves it often leads to outbursts, harmful isolation, and a myriad of other consequences for both ourselves and those we care about. Here are some examples of how to communicate personal boundaries in a kind way.

PC: Mellow Doodles

This could be a great tool if you are an individual struggling with negative consequences emotionally and psychologically related to social media.
Huge shout out to for sharing this information!

“Change required the ability to accept what was already there.” -Daniel Siegel, M.D.
Change is possible only when we work to let down our defenses and justifications and name what is. This is the first step on the path of acceptance which, so often, ends in transformation.

Some of us are prone to attempt to assess how much misery we inflict upon ourselves in order to be free of our past mistakes and wrong doings.
True healing and restoration is not accomplished by taking punishment into our own hands whether toward ourselves or those who have wronged us.
Be accountable. Work to let the rest go.
PC: .holistic.psychologist

When healing from a “red flag” relationship, sometimes it’s difficult to identify what behaviors/qualities to look for or move forward with in a healthy relationship. Here’s some possibilities!
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It is official! Today Carrie Reeves Counseling officially becomes Pneuma Counseling! 🌬
You might ask, “Why this strange title?” Allow me to nerd out for one moment. Pneuma (noo•muh) is an Ancient Greek word meaning “breath”, “spirit”, or sometimes “breath of life”. My desire is to offer life giving services in an effort to promote healing and restoration.
There are many layered reasons contributing to this name choice and I could not be more thrilled!

Special thanks to for logo creation 🍃