CandiCares, PLLC

Hmmm...

I'm unsure that many will react to this post.

Hmmm... 😊

With what I've been hearing lately, I had to share...

Today, two dogs roamed the parking lot of my office building in Winston-Salem on Brownsboro Road. The black dog ran away from me. This tan female came up to me. She looks like a puppy and is not chipped (I took her to a vet on my way home.) I'm worried that these dogs were just dropped off by someone. Does anyone in the Winston-Salem area know who this female pooch belongs to?

To all mothers and mother figures...

So true...

I LOVE THIS ANALOGY:

You are holding a cup of coffee when someone comes along and bumps into you or shakes your arm, making you spill your coffee everywhere.

Why did you spill the coffee?

"Because someone bumped into me!!!"

Wrong answer.

You spilled the coffee because there was coffee in your cup.

Had there been tea in the cup, you would have spilled tea.

Whatever is inside the cup is what will spill out.

Therefore, when life comes along and shakes you (which WILL happen), whatever is inside you will come out. It's easy to fake it, until you get rattled.

So we have to ask ourselves... “what's in my cup?"

When life gets tough, what spills over?

Joy, gratitude, peace and humility?

Anger, bitterness, victim mentality and quitting-tendencies?

Life provides the cup, YOU choose how to fill it.

Today let's work towards filling our cups with gratitude, forgiveness, joy, words of affirmation, resilience, positivity; and kindness, gentleness and love for others. 🤗

Dr Fami

Obstacles, trials, or unexpected mishaps may be hidden blessings or lead to a remarkable change. Don't deny or always avoid emotional pains.

Someone once said if you take care of someone with dementia you lose them more and more everyday. When they get the diagnosis, when they go through different stages, when they need treatment and when they pass away. This is called "ambigua loss".

I don't wish dementia on anyone. As the brain slowly dies, they change physically and eventually forget who their loved ones are. They could end up lying in bed, not moving and not eating or drinking.

There will be people who will scroll past this post because Dementia has not touched them. They may not know what it's like to have a loved one who has battled or is still battling dementia.

Let's raise awareness of this cruel disease for
Alzheimer Awareness Week! 💜

Send a message to learn more

Don't forget... It's this weekend.

Tomorrow is Election Day. Please vote. Even "small" elections count.

If your area has Early Voting, go VOTE. These elections Do matter.

A necessary REPOST to start a conversation that many don't have or delay.

**It's IMPORTANT to get your affairs in order‼️**

Really good information. IF YOU DO NOTHING ELSE, put a beneficiary on all of your financial accounts like checking savings CDs, Life Insurance, investments etc. You don't need a will for them to get to your money, just a death certificate. And make a list, preferably by hand instead of your computer, either give it to your trusted person, spouse or put it in your security box at the bank. If the person doesn't know you have a savings account or a CD at XYZ Bank, they can never go get the money. Make sure you have a trusted person that is a signer on the security box at the bank.

💰Make sure all bank accounts have direct beneficiaries. The beneficiary need only go to the bank with your death certificate and an ID of their own.

🏡 TOD = Transfer On Death deed if you own a home. Completing this document and filing it with your county saves your heirs THOUSANDS. This document allows you to transfer ownership of your home to your designee. All they need to do is take their ID and your death certificate to the county building and the deed is signed over. Doing this will avoid the home having to go through probate.

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦Living Will: Allows one to put in writing exactly what you want done in the event you cannot speak for yourself when it comes to healthcare decisions as well as other final decisions.

👩🏽‍⚖️Durable Power of Attorney: Allows one to designate a person to make legal decisions if you are no longer competent to do so.

🏥Power of Attorney for Healthcare: This document allows one to designate someone to make healthcare decisions for them.

🛍Last Will and Testament: Designates to whom personal belongings will go to, who the Administrator will be. But if you have a beneficiary on any of your financial accounts, that will override a will. For instance if you say I leave all of my possessions to my daughter Susie, but on your savings account the beneficiary is your best friend, then the money goes to your best friend

🪦Funeral Planning Declaration: Allows one to say exactly one’s wishes as far as disposition of the body and the services.

If the above documents are done, you can AVOID probate.

If all the above is not done, you have to open an estate account at the bank. All money that doesn’t have direct beneficiaries goes into this account. You have to have an attorney to open the estate account. The attorney also has to publicize your passing in the newspaper or post publication at the county courthouse, to allow anyone to make a claim on your property. - It’s a complete PAIN.

📚 💳Make a list of all banks and account numbers, all investment institutions with account numbers, lists of credit cards, utility accounts, etc. Leave clear instructions as to how and when these things are paid.

Make sure heirs know where life insurance policies are located. 📂

📝Make 100% sure SOMEONE knows your bank ID account logins and passwords!

🚗 Make sure you have titles for all vehicles, campers, etc!

Set up a TRUST for intended beneficiaries, especially those that are too young, and appoint a trustee of said trust.

MOST IMPORTANTLY!!!! - Talk with those closest to you and make all your wishes KNOWN. Talk to those whom you’ve designated, as well as those close to you whom you did not designate. - Do this to explain why your decisions were made and to avoid any lingering questions or hurt feelings.

⚡️Hope this helps! ⚡️Hope this lights a spark to encourage all your friends and family to take care of these things to make it easier for those we all leave behind!

My hope is that the above list at least helps you start an important conversation with your loved ones...

(REPOST-I DID) and it’s a very necessary conversation!

Blessed 2024! 🎊
It is wonderful to bring in another year. Yet, it seems over the years that after the holidays, I have witnessed how many, in a short period of time, close their eyes forever. Grief is immeasurable and handled differently. Be patient, understanding, compassionate and prayerful. 🕊️ 🤍 (for the departed) ❤️ (for those remaining)

Happy Holidays to All!
From: Dr. Candace
CandiCares, PLLC

If you don't understand why grieving continues so long for someone, consider yourself fortunate to not have experienced such. 🕊️

What do you see as your "reality?"

Mental Health matters! 💚

Teach kindness and compassion to others different from you ... 💚🧡💛

Never be ashamed of yourself.
Be proud of who you are, and don't worry about how others see you.

The world is so different now... (I had to share this post from another FB friend.) Food for thought 🤔

💚 MENTAL HEALTH MATTERS! 💚

One's mental health is as important as one's physical well-being.

Diagnoses such as OCD, prolonged grief, PTSD, depression, anxiety, and other mental diagnoses are real. Diagnoses are given. The person is Not the diagnosis.

Offer Compassion, Understanding, Support, and Patience 🕊️

🕰 Remember to FORWARD your clocks 1 hour tonight. ⏰

Here's a laugh for you. Mind your Business...